Trimton 2 Review

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Hihi! If you are reading this, thank you for still visiting despite the lack of updates! I have been so busy that i really have no time to do more than what i am already doing now.

What’s depressing is that, the past mths have been very unkind to me. I can hardly breathe. 😦
Because of the lack of time and mood, i have stopped visiting the GYM and wasting my money monthly. To add on to the woes, i am getting out of shape AGAIN!

The CNY goodies, the late night supper and the lack of exercises…i dont even want to imagine and describe. -__-

These are what i have been eating (and much more which pictures are not posted!)

Ok, i am not fat as in fat, i am not gonna burst the weighing machine in anyway but i can  feel the toned muscles turning flabby and soft again.
I am a UK 8 – 12. Some say that is fat, some say that is just plump while some loves the shape of a uk8-12.
The bf loves me this way as he digs curves and he forbids me from losing anymore. As an asian, i feel i can be skinnier.

So…imagine how  glad i am when Trimton Singapore send me their latest product!
Just a simple introduction of the product:

Trimton 2 is focus on [Cut Oil and Weight Loss] in natural way, reduces oil the natural way:
．Breakthrough E.Microen (肠溶性微粒)Technology stimulate the effect brought by the natural ingredients;
．Oil-blocking effect in intestine;
．Effectively blocks out and dissolves oil from food intake up to 80%.

Targets fatty Area:
．Increases body heat at fatty area and burns fat;
．HCA and Chlorogenic Acid help body to prevent fat storing;
．Effectively reduces body fat percentage.

Treatment:
Using Trimton 2 for 3 month as a treatment, it is suggest taking 2 capsule a day, one for breakfast or lunch and other one for dinner and dosage with warm water.
The main ingredients HCA & Chlorogenic Acid can help to reduce the fat up to 52%; Green tea polyphenols and organic acids can help to block oil intake up to 30% and help to slim up your whole body and lose weight.

Honestly, i have my reservation towards slimming pills as there have been too many cases of damaged livers or other organs because of slimming medication.
However, i decided to give Trimton 2 a try after reading about their ingredients. All the ingredients used are natural and i feel safe upon knowing that. Trimton 2 are extracted from natural ingredients included Green Coffee Bean, Grapefruit, Purple Rice, Green Tea and Garcinia Cambogia. It will pass to SGS Western medicine test for regular approval basis to confirm there is no western medicine ingredients and safe to use.

This has ntg  to do with the effectiveness of the product, but i gotta say, the pills are looking cute like candies. 😛

Also, alot of slimming products usually cause side effects like Insomnia and heavy pounding of the heart and etc.
Trimton 2 does not causes all that, at least not what i have been experiencing during this period of taking the medication.

As for the  results, i cant tell for now as i am on the program for less than a month. However, even though i cant feel i am skinny now, i do feel that my body is being controlled, i am not gaining as it was before i take Trimton 2. I would like to add, i havent been exercising too.

Trimton 2 is selling at $118, Buy 1 get 1 Free at Guardian.

After taking the bottle of Trimton2, i have decided that this product indeed help in maintaining. To be honest, it didnt really make me lose weight, but the bf is saying that he can see that i am not as ‘fleshy’ as before.
For myself, i feel that my shape is maintained:)

Full body pictures of me Now:

Vdates – October Fantastic Baby Edition

Hi!

Happy Monday! I am dozing off after the crazy amount of workout ytd and 1/2 of the atarax.
Actually, i have been deprived of sleep since Friday. FML!

YAWNS!!!!
Ok, before anything, i would like to share my very first Korean POP song.

LOL!

I didnt even know they are called the Big Bang until my little sis told me ytd (we were dancing to this song for Zumba).
At first, i was like “WTF? Y KPOP AH?”

My sis screamed with excitement. I stared at her. She was so excited for K-POP. Goodness.
I dont fancy and i wont be keen in KPOP at all.
Sorry KPOP fans, i dont mean to offend, but i really do not know how to appreciate lah, sorry. I old liao, so i am very “evergreen-ish” LOL

But i must admit that i am addicted to this song, prolly due to the dance. HAHA.
Sometime back, i was asking my sister “eh who is G dragon ar? which band is that ar? y got so many de, y gt Big Bang, gt G dragon, gt don’t know what Tarsha or wadever “(sorry, i really do not know how to spell the right name, if i spell any name wrongly, my bad!)

Sister: G Dragon is 1 of the members in Big Bang.

I: FML. U mean it isnt a band?

Sister: Nope, he is in Big Bang.

LOL! Is this generation gap? I was like…shit, i am really sounding OLD now.  But why does people actually like these Korean boy bands ar?
I was looking at the MV for the 13832820 time and i still do not find them cute AT ALL leh?
Ok, there is this blue hair dude with green eyebrows, he looks ok.
Sis say his name is TOP, and is her fav guy in the group. Right.
But the rest are like….cute meh?
I even asked her to please point out G dragon to me, as i was asking over Line, (an app on iphones and android) all she can tell me was “he is the most skinny dude”

I: The long hair on one side guy ar?
Sister: yea.

OMG, why would anyone think this is cute ar?!

Ok, i better stop here. I am sorry Kpop fans, i am really old already, cant blame ah, i am just not appreciative but i really  think the music is very addictive. Haha, and very nice to dance along too!

I also admire the fact that they are so creative in their appearances and make up, so yah.
Hope that make up the fact that “i do not know how to find them cool/cute.”  -_-

Eh, who is G Dragon again??? Which one???? There is no one with long hair in this pic leh!

Ok, so much for Big  Bang and Kpop. Haha, as i was saying, i had my first Zumba lesson ytd with Sis and GF. It was mad fun. But Gf didnt like it much. Both sis and i were enjoying so much n i am yearning for  more. 1 hr passed by so quickly. It was really fun, we danced to different genres of songs, and of course, 1 of which was the 1 above, that was my first true ‘interaction’ with Kpop HAHAH!
Actually not exactly, just that i danced to it for the 1st time, Sis plays Kpop all the time at home and i just roll my eyes everytime.
We also tried street jazz, hip hop, reggae, disco, and many others. I was sweating like a pig and it was really fun, cant wait for the next lesson! 😛

Because the GF wasnt really enjoying, so we accompanied her for her fav Body Combat lesson, and you know what, i was so damn sure i cant even complete the class because it was already mad  tiring after 1 hr of non stop dancing.
But i did! All of us survived the Body combat lesson and i am extremely proud of myself.
Looks like my stamina is catching up and i am getting fitter! HAHA.

Before that, i was telling GF that i will never complete the Body Combat lesson because of 2 reasons:
1) It killed me last week and i sprained every part of my legs
2) After 1 hr of Zumba, i think i will prolly die  there if i continue with Body Combat. It was a back to back lesson, immediately after the Zumba, Body Combat continues.

But we did it! Pats on my own shoulder. 🙂  Did it.

You see, i mentioned before that Exercising really makes 1 very motivated and makes 1 understand that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE.
Alot of times, we give up when we are nearly there, but if we endure that bit more, we will reach there!

Anyway, i have been pushing myself to work out recently as i was getting complacent. But thank  God i found new classes like Zumba and etc to keep me going! It is no longer just cycling and stepping machines, they are rather boring to me now.
Also, i have been lifting weights to tone those flabby arms and working on the various machines to tone the fat thighs. They are not skinny but they are not that flabby 😡 But….

Please ah, this picture is definitely edited. If not my skin wudnt be that smooth looking.
It is filtered like crazy. But with phone app, not photoshop. i STILL do not know how to use PS. -_-

Still a long way to go and i really enjoy sweating, and will continue exercising! I am also on a program that helps to build up my metabolism, aids reducing Visceral fats, (please take some time to click on the link of Visceral fats as it is apparently more dangerous than the normal fats that you can see with your naked eyes). I have been on this program for approximately 20days?
I can already see the small difference of my body shape but i shall sum in up at the end of my program and show some before and after pictures.
I do not think i wana show it now as there will definitely be more differences in the next 2 months, i will show my progress along the way though and reveal the program to you at the end of the program.  You be the judge and see if it is effective ok?

Will talk more about that program. Those that are keen to know can pm me at valenciafaithz.z@gmail.com.

Of course, i feel better of myself now because a good  change (to the body) is always a pleasant sight to the eyes of many, but most importantly, my eyes love what they see in the mirror. 🙂

Random photo #OOTD

Pardon this super random weird pic, i just love it whenever i flex those hard muscles while fixing the hair.
I used to have really flabby arms, so i am darn proud of myself now 😛

Anw, my past week was busy planning for …Project L, and i managed to catch up with Alan and Zen (my fav maid. haha) over the Friday. It was also Felyncia’s Birthday, though we were never close, but i wish her a very good birthday and may she find her own happiness soon! 🙂

We were chilling at some pub and  then went over to 1 of the thai joints. Not a fan of the place, but the company was good, my ex colls were there, catch up with them abit, and guess who i met? Shihui! 🙂

It’s been so long, am i glad to see her again and she still look so beautiful. Thank God she still treat me as a friend as there was some misunderstandings in the past between us. Though we can never go back to those days but thank God we are still well. 🙂

I haven been hanging out for so long and i totally let loose that night and went home feeling a tad drunk. Went to bed at 5ish and woke up at 9 the next day. Made breakfast for myself and felt lik crap. Hangover is bad, but Hangover after so many years, is worse. I was like a walking zombie.

But thank goodness i had enough training back in those days when i was marketing for Lifebrandz, i managed to reach home safely. 😛 Ok, i have to include the fact  that i was marketing in that ex co because alot of crazy people actually think i was working as some hostess if i say my prev job needs to drink like a fish. Just a tiny clarification, thanks!

So Saturday, Aunt treated us to dinner and yah, the dinner was really good. In fact, if you ask me to choose spending $ at some restaurant or this place, i will not hesitate to recommend this eating place. It is located at Aljunied, in fact, it is very near to Aljunied MRT station, just beside it.
Every item from the menu is good and it only cost us $160+ for 6 pax. We ordered alot of food that day.
1) Marmite chicken
2) Braised Fish Steamboat
3) Kang Kong (Veg)
4) Xiao Bai Cai (Veg)
5) Salted Egg Prawns
6) Yam Ring

The affordable prices of the food does not compromise with the quality and it is definitely worth it. However, the downside of the place would be the waiting time. It takes a longer time as it is always crowded, and the waiting time for food is rather long too. But that is small problem, i rather wait for good food than eating crappy food at some expensive restaurants.

Yeap. Address of the place is : 76 Lorong 25A Geylang

Anw, like i was saying, i was working out like a mad woman yesterday and i slept like a baby last night. Wanted to continue as a baby but of course, i cant, and i am here, dozing off.

Alright, i am really zonking out and i gtg, till the next post people! God Bless

Vdates – it’s been a while

Hi everyone! Thank you for STILL visiting this space even though the updates are lesser and shorter.

Anyway, i am not really well, as mentioned previously and i am really busy planning some stuff. Thus i really feel sorry for not updating.
But initially when i started this blog, i wanted to write as and when i want to and not feeling obliged to.

I hate restrictions and i like to do things at my pace. Not a good thing because it reflects ill discipline, i noe. But honestly, blogging is not really part of the important aspects of my life as of now.

Alot happened and emotionally and physically, i am not able to handle my life for the past month. But all is good, nothing is too dramatic unless i allow it (which regrettably, i did in a few events)

So, i went to see the doc with Mum on 16th. Got my meds but not feeling much difference though. But i am glad i took the first step to improve things. Hopefully my condition can be more stable so that i wont hurt myself and most importantly, the people around me.

It was a fruitful day that day because we managed to do what we wanted and needed to on the  ToDoList.

I am really excited to introduce some new events in my life that are happening soon and i hope you will be as excited as i am too. Hurhur.

Of course, when 1 gains, 1 loses. I ‘lost’ 2 friends whom i was once closed with in the past month. I used to write a whole chunk of reasons why, just to defend myself in the past. Not anymore.

All i can say is, my conscience is clear, i do not need to pacify friends with kids behavior, i do not need to be interrogated, I do not need to please a Malebitch who is interested in my personal thoughts and wana gossip out of it.
I would also wana add that, i am indeed upset initially but after seeing the picture clearly, i dont give a shit to why would the wife of this friend arrange for friends gathering just the next day after we argue. The gathering excludes me, of course. you wana be scheming? Beware of Karma, thats Buddha’s teaching.

Another friend who seem so kind and full of Gospel preaching is now no longer someone i can trust nor believe. All i can say is, i understand that boyfriends are important, i have my moments of neglecting friends for boyfriends. But this time round, i see how a ‘preacher’ fails in actions, and she is supposed to be my spiritual buddy, my good friend and my insurance agent. But in short, during the time i need her the most, whether if it is during my sickness or whether it is related to the insurance issues, SHE WAS NEVER THERE.

So fuck off with hypocrisy and the fake whatsapp concern msges. Just Get out totally from my life.

I wana quit drama so pardon the french, FO. And to those that think i am the problem, perhaps i am really the problem. So it makes it better for them to lose me and vice versa. Hope that makes u happy.

Ok anyway, thank God my gf is still with me. we had our first fight during the time i went crazy a mth ago. But really, we are still as close or closer. Love her.

As i mentioned, alot has happened and i really do not think i wana pen them down 1 by 1. So generally, i am trying my best to summarize.

Sister has moved out to try out being independent and to take a break. Initially, we were very reluctant to let her do that but i guess everyone has to go through certain phases in life. I just pray that she is safe out there.

This Mid Autumn Festival, we will still meet to eat mooncakes for no1 can resist durian snowskin from Peony Jade, not forgetting the Dark Choc Cognac snowskin from Raffles Hotel. LOL. Yes, i bought them all without hesitation, i am a sucker for snowskins. 😛

Best Meal at the Most affordable price ever during the recent short trip.

\

I feel so sorry for being sucha brat to my aunt recently. I guess i really have alot to improve on. My temper especially. 😦

Love this picture of my sis and i, discovered it in my Aunt’s Hp. Grabbed it! 😛

So anw, recently the family gathered to celebrate Aunt’s Bday and it was a happy celebration. The bill for the dinner was like $400+ for 6 of us. FOL. haha. It was really worth it because the food was really decent compared to the last place we went (i cant emphasize enough how bad it was, please read HERE)

We went to Rama Thai Restaurant, it is a small restuarant that is seated along the street of wedding shops at Tanjong Pagar. Previously,i ate at this place with my colleagues and boss and we thought they serve pretty good Thai- Teochew food.
Thus i went back the second time with my family to try out more dishes. Do not be alarmed by the amount i mentioned previously, it was $400+ because i was greedy. I added alot more dishes on top of our set meals.
If you have a lesser budget but intend to have really good food, you may opt for the $28++/pax or $38++/pax set meals. Honestly, the quantity is alot and the quality is definitely worth every cent.

And yes, the set meals promotional price is available on weekends too, you might have to check if they open on Sunday though. I did not ask and even if i did, i prolly forgot. Here is  their Website: http://www.ramathai.com.sg/

Was really happy that all are present this time round, for a birthday gathering. All of us were very happy, especially aunt 🙂 Well, it felt like CNY reunion and frankly, this has never really happen ever since God knows how many decades.

Even Uncle went! He paid the full sum and i felt bad because i was the 1 that wanted to celebrate for my Aunt, thus i sneakily hide half of the total amount in his room. LOL

We went back to Granny’s to cut cake and went home to crush after that, everyone was exhausted.

Btw, Happy Birthday Aunt, You are precious!

So, yah, i kinda jumbled up all the activities and stuff in this post. But yah. I am sorry. Haha. Rushing for time as i have other stuff to take care of.
Hope you dont mind the tiny bits of me being frank and loud, i cant and i dont want to contain inside me.

But still, may God bless all! Till next update!

Vdates Aug (1)

Heylo!

I recently went to get my fringe trimmed. Boring me has officially return to having “bangs” again. Yeap. Boring.

I wanted so much to persist on having long and flowy fringe like my GF but i couldnt take it no more. The fringe is getting on my nerves by getting into my eye all the time.

It was kinda random because i just walked into a Shunji Matsuo after my workout at the Gym and requested for Bangs. I hope i look better now. GF said that i look like a kid but really, i wish i do. But ney, i dont  think so.

HAHAAH.

All along, fringe always has the higher votes, but who cares right, i gotta like what i see in the mirror and not accommodating to what others like. I used to keep my fringe long just because my ex bfs prefer that to “bangs”. All the while in the past, i was pleasing others. But honestly, if a person is gona love me any lesser just because of my hair, then he can go love others. I dont need such love. But of  course, i dont mean anyone must love my dirty hair if i never wash for weeks la.

HAHA!

Ok anyway, i love this bangs now. No matter who say what.

🙂

the before and after!

Nothing much over the past 2 weeks. The usual, i hit the gym, stay home for movie marathon (alone and with Mummy), hang out with gf, played with babies, went church.

Frankly, i still go to church despite whatever is happening and despite the uneasiness in me. Thus i was hoping that the msg i receive can be pure. Last week’s msg was good and i did alot of reflection on myself as well. But honestly, it will be better if there wasnt so much hidden implications. I mean, it is a personal feeling, sorry if i wronged anyone but i love Dr Robi. I just wish that at certain point of time, there wasnt so much awkward hints of personal attacks without mentioning of names. I wish there wasnt so much clapping and cheering for the wrong reason.

Watched so much movies that i really cant remember how many. Haha! But i think the 1 that left a deep impression on me was Unfaithful.

I used to avoid watching some shows and betrayals/ adultery-related is def 1 of them. I guess it was due to an old scar in me. But well, everyone has to recover somehow or rather and so i did. The show was a long one, by Richard Gere and the beautiful Diane Lane. It is so rich with emotions and very realistic. But somehow, i can relate to how the characters feel in the show. Still, i was cursing the wife because she hurt the husband so deeply while indulging in her sexual desires.

Oh well…

Anyway, i took some pictures while trying some clothes. Guess which 1s did i buy?

I love them all though.

Like usual, i did not edit nor photoshop the pictures. I did filtered them though. I would also want to keep a record of how the body looks as time passes while i continue with my exercises.

The fact is that nothing much is shed, i am still not a Size 0. Oh please, i am not even a size 4. I am a size 8 to 10 and very occasionally 6 for certain brands.
But really, i am feeling better of myself now than 6mths ago because although not solid fit as in FIT, i am not as flabby as before. Especially my arms, and i believe my legs are slowly but surely becoming tougher.
It feels better no matter what i am decking on my body now, at least i know it is not on a pile of soft flabs. HAHA!

Some commented the clothes i wore above look disastrous on me, while my collgeaue just told me 1 min ago that she feels i have been exercising wrongly because she feels i still look ‘fat’ wor.

Ok, to say i am not offended by either is  gona be so  fake, i am affected but trust me, it is only to a certain extent.
In the past, i would be so affected till i feel inferior of myself, till i doubt myself, till i feel so scared whenever i head out. I would feel terrible and i would ask myself why are people looking at me.

Not anymore.

Really, i dont want to swear but trust me. Things are different now.

Look, my colleague is alot bigger than me and sometimes i really doubt her agenda of saying mean things to me. Of course, i am giving her the benefit of doubt too. She might really want the best for me but i dont think i should listen to someone that eats and eats and goes on diet pills. She doesnt exercise at all, and thus why should i be listening to her?

It doesnt help when i caught her staring at my new clothes. my body and my hair. It is super creepy because i caught her doing that while my back was facing her. Why would i know – you asked. I have a mirror infront of me and her expressions was reflected – crystal clear. Scary much.

Honestly, i am not a confident person which many thought i am. I have been through alot of things and along the experiences i have, i build myself up slowly and i am still not 100% as confident as you might think i am. But i am thankful i started somewhere, since i dont know where.

If you are a inferior person, I hope you can too, Look, you gotta start somewhere and you gotta do something about it. I am tired of wallowing in self pity and self blame. Arent you?

I know it is tough but slowly, surely. Remember that nobody is confident from birth. Sometimes i confuse myself too. Sometimes i mix up humility with inferiority. It is tough for me as i always thought that being humble is good but sometimes i tend to be too humble for my own good and it turns into ugly inferiority. It is really hard, and i m still figuring which is which. Dont ask me why because i do not know how to explain, it is just me.

But really, trust me, not everyone views you as how badly you view yourself. If you know you are doing the right thing and you know the right thing you do can produce right result, What does it matter if who say what?

For eg. my colleague. She is always saying i am fat when she is so much bigger than me, when she just eats and does not exercise. I and probably the whole world knows  that, exercising will be a long term beneficial plan than diet pills and supplements. I and probably  the whole world knows that i will look more freshened up, my muscles will look so much nicer and i will look toner than before.
Does what she says actually matters?

You prolly seen this in my insta. I shall repost for those that havent.

It really doesnt matter what others say.
Because not everyone is gona like what u say what u do what u talk abt what u wear what u watch whatever.
Some might just be jealous, some are just opinionated and the others are jus genuinely not liking you.
What matters is, do u like yourself?
Do u like what u say/do/watch/wear or eat? If u do, that settles it.
If u trust ur own judgment and preference, that settles it.
Nobody feels gd abt u if u cant even feel good about urself.
Check that mirror and see wonderful image and let those critics go on, they cant see a bigger picture.
#confidence

.

This is just an example i would want to share with you. Sorry if my example isnt great enough but really, because i go through criticism like you do, and this is so real and instant (happened about 1 min ago), i just have to quote this example.

Alot of others doubt me too, saying i am not spiritual enough. But really, i do not have to account to anyone about my spiritual being, i know it is enough as long as i account myself to God. Some others quote bible verses and some others preach alot but i really dont see them walk the talk anyways. So, what you see might not be what is real anyway.

What i am trying to say here is, as long as you have a clear conscience of what is right, and you are not guilty of doing the wrong thing, who cares abt what they say?

Beauty is subjective, you can be Jessica Alba and there will still be people saying you are ugly. Thus lets not even touch on that. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Confidence is Beauty but Arrogance is not, neither is Inferiority. I am very much aware of this thus i am reminding myself constantly.

I hope you too, keep that in mind.

It is definitely not easy for me to type these out because now and then i struggle with insecurity. It was just weeks ago that i cried out to Mel about my chest problem (i will leave it private and talk more about it next time)
It was just days ago i keep feeling bloated and fat.

But it is also God’s way of showing me that, hey, Jennifer Lawrence is so gorgeous and her body is so hot despite not being a size 0 or 6. She isnt your typical bombshell nor Kate Moss but boy, her body is so hot. (and she is weighing above 60kg fyi)
Yeap, i watched the Silver Linings Playbook over the long weekend. Haha.

Credits of images: healthyceleb.com

It is also God’s way of showing me that alot of people only talk the talk and not walk the talk when situations arise. That certain person who preaches alot is now missing in action.
I shant judge but yeap, alot of times it is like that.

Not many might know about your struggles and your credits for doing well, but you know, God knows. Sometimes it is enough.

Before i end this post, here is wishing everyone that God show u (including me pls) how much potential you have, and how beautiful you are and for those tt are too arrogant, may God shows you defeat so you practice humility.

In my opinion, Leslie Cheung has to be the most beautiful Man in Asia besides Takaeshi Kaneshiro.
Given the fact that Leslie Cheung is all natural, he wins Kaneshiro of course! (the latter had plastic)
But even Leslie himself was being insulted as ‘ugly Gay’. *Roll eyes- since when sexual preference has to do with looks right
Ryan Gosling, almost the next perfect thing in Hollywood, was just criticized by my friend this morning of being ugly. I mean, who the crap will say that?!

Now i really hope you see the picture, nobody will earn the liking of everyone. Not even Ryan Gosling nor Leslie Cheung.

I wish i can write more but i gotta go, i promise more for next time round! 🙂 Meanwhile be blessed and browse my random pictures. :p

Supposed to be a drinking session but it turned out to be durian + Red wine session over at Zen’s crib over the long weekend.

Pigeons around my house, lazy to even move when i am near.

Woo! Mum and my treats for the PH eve.
The Pink 1 was really very attractive, even more attractive after you open the packaging.
Taste good too! 

My 1 way ticket to failure of diet plan with my gf. 

The show i didnt manage to even start, gona watch it this coming weekend!
Gerard Butler~

Indeed and i am facing this dilemma non stop. 
I guess i will figure it out.

A song i long forgotten if not for the movie. My fav~

Stevie Wonder – Don’t you worry bout a thing

Vdates July (1)

Hihi`

It is July and it is already the 2nd week of July! How is everybirdy?

Finally, the disgusting June is over. It was sucha unhealthy month for myself and my family. Finally, a new month is here and i really look forward  to a better month ahead.

Actually, i have nothing much to update. Yah, i feel that i am a lazy blogger too. But really, there isnt much to write at this moment.
The past weeks were challenging for my family and myself because we were mostly sick and the sister was suspected of having dengue fever.

Mum and i had to be in the hospital with her and then Mum had to go for her mini day surgery for her knee.

Basically, i hated June lah. I am glad my sis is now recovering and nope she is not having Dengue, but she still coughs alot, prolly due to the haze.
As for Mum, glad she is resting well at home and i like seeing her resting at home. HAHA.

As for myself, i was sick too and i am still trying to maintain my healthy lifestyle. Though it gets really tiring sometimes but it is all worth it, feeling the muscles gets tougher and knowing that my new lifestyle prolly benefits me aplenty (comparing to my old lifestyle months ago).

I am liking my body more but honestly, there is still a long way ahead. The arms are more toned now, and alot of improvement can be noticed from the arms. The body is still not really improving much, the thighs still need much improvement :S
But i am happy with myself though i am sure i will be happier with what i see months (or weeks) later (i hope?! lol)

I am looking forward to end Jul and Aug as Sis and i are going to celebrate Mummy’s bday. Time flies, another year passed and it seems like not long ago that we celebrated Mum’s hatchy. Hurhur.

Not gonna say what we are doing for her. I want to keep it a surprise. (LOL, although she wun be reading my blog for sure, but i just want to keep it really intimate between my sis and i. hahaha)

My sis has the talent of baking and cooking. she made these cheese tarts, nice!

Random Old School HK Vampire movie again which My Mum doesnt get sick of watching. Movie night with Mummy.

My Sat- Gym for workout, then to Church. The Church has moved back to Suntec City and looking fabulous.
Dinner at Melben Seafood. Visited the new branch at Opal Crescent, i was expecting the food to be slightly inferior compared to the Melben at TPY. However, the Salted Egg Crab really impressed me, the Creamy Curry Chicken is good too. The spinach is plain but the soup is very sweet and overall, i rate it 4/5. Definitely worth trying.

Ok, before this blog turns absolutely boring, i promise iwill think of topics to write. I used to touch on several topics to write but havent been doing so for sometime. Gimme some time ok? I was tired from all the terrible happenings and i am sure u understand.

Will let the brain function really really soon~

Meanwhile, some peektures to sum up this very short and ‘nothing much’ post.

Random peekture of my lunch today. Tasty!

Have been contemplating if i should do a soft rebond or just leave my hair the way it is. I am not sure if Curls or Straights suits me better.
Look, some say Curls while some prefer Straights.
As for myself, i like Curls but i feel it makes me look older sometimes.
Shrugs.

What do you think?

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Ok, i promise again that i will write more soon. Till then~ God bless.

Vdates June (1)

Hi`

I am back to blog about some updates.

Feeling very sleepy and lethargic now and i just wish to get this done and over with.

As usual, i know myself, if i drag this post any further, this post will never be up.

The past weeks were not very good for me, Mum was in the hospital and both Sis and i were so tired rushing  to hosp daily after work and we slept late everyday.

I think we still owe sleep debts and the weekends were really not enough.

Used to think that “having no time” is an excuse. Not till i finally realise that i literally have no time.

However, i managed to take some time off lunch to cycle in the gym, even if it is only 30 to 40 mins each time.

I used to hate exercising. SUPER HATE and MAJOR HATE. I know boys in the past who find Sporty girls hot and i was like “nah“. I know of sporty people in the past who never fails to try convincing me that exercising is good and Blah Blah Blah….

But i rejected and denied all Sports related topics.

However, thank God that due to my weight gain, i started to exercise.
Initially, it was really unbearable. It is like doing chores you hate, it is like super frustrating to me.

Before i start, i would like to say that i am not preaching about Health and Exercises because it can be rather boring, but i would like to share how i feel about Exercising . The views you are gona read will be coming from a person who has NEVER exercise since young (please do not include the Physical Education time in school), someone who really hated exercising.

Ok, at the beginning, i just want to shed some fats because i have gained weight though Chips and Chocs – nuff said (HAAA)
Comparing to the time i was really depressed while i was with my ex, i look alot more rounder than then. I was really sad and depressed back then and thus i look skinnier then.

Around a year ago.
Cant exactly find the pictures i took last time, this was during those times which i was not very happy (cant tell from the pic right?)
and i was kinda skinnier than now -_-
Pardon the damn wig.

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.

Now!

 LOL the picture without mosiac is super MEH!
Thats my Aunt’s place btw, i went to visit her.

I started with running. It was not too bad because each time after running, i feel much better about myself.
Not that i would see immediate effects of slimming, but i feel better because i managed to do something i never thought i would, i managed to run 30mins each time even though i thought i would collapse at the 15th minute.

There is a sense of achievement and is really fulfilling.

I feel the immediate effect of being ‘lightened’ (of course, there will not be differences in the weight THAT FAST and thus it is not the weight i am talking about), i am talking about  the muscles and the ‘lightening’ feeling one has after exercising.
It is something like how you would feel after a massage.

That was in April and i was still eating normally, not exactly clean.

In May, i started doing more exercises and i managed to do some squats and stretching and  toning. Till date, i am still not very diligent in doing them, which i am guilty of.
However, i started going to the gym.

Almost everyone i know tell me the following points:

1) Exercise does not requires you to waste Money. Signing up with a Gym is waste of Money.

2) Going to Gym does not help you with slimming down.

3) It is a waste of time.

Well, i used to think that way too.

However, i really enjoy the facilities of the gym and i love using the machines. I know that the treadmill doesnt help in slimming but i am fine, i dont really like running on that, i rather run on my own if i wana run.
(i have stopped running for more than a mth thou, however i substitute running with other exercises, more on that later)

And the reason why i decide to sign a package with the gym is because….

1) I do agree that exercising does not requires one to spend $. But i am a noob in sports, i do not know what kind of exercises to do on my own, i do not know where to start without the help of machines and PT (personal trainers).
Yes, i can watch Youtube and learn but honestly, that is a chore to me.

I am not saying that i am rich, i do not know the definition of ‘rich’ as it varies but i am def not in the ‘rich’ category. However, i  guess i can still afford that $100+/ mth at the moment.
I want to enjoy my exercise regime and searching for ways on Youtube  is definitely not enjoyable for me.
I want proper guidance and someone whom i can ask.
I want a place which i can go to, to do my workout. Thus i decided to spend this amount of money.
It is approximately $150 a month for my package. Which also means  that it costs me around $15 per visit IF i visit the gym 10 times a month.

It has been less than a month since i am with the gym, and i think i lost count in the number of times i go. Prolly more than 10? I honestly cant remember. But at $15/ per visit, it is really worth it. (that is if i visit 10 times a month, if i visit more times a month, for eg. 15, it basically means i pay only $10 per visit)

There are also free lessons, which might cost a bomb if you sign up outside (i used to sign up lessons with the Community Centers and yeah, they arent exactly cheap)

2) I was saying how much i hated exercising right? To me, it was never easy to exercise because i was never a sporty person. I was lazy and i still am lazy to a certain extent. Exercising is not exactly enjoyable because i hated to sweat, i hated how i look during exercising (super unglam), i hated the out of breathe feeling.
I did not exactly excel in school for exercising and i used to think i am just not cut out for exercising.

However, during this period of time which i attempted to exercise, i find that i have fallen in love with working out.
It is a very refreshing feeling each time. On days which i am very tired and sleepy, i will usually rest but sometimes i push myself to cycle for at least 30mins and i usually feel super refreshed aft that.
I am not sure why but it is supposed to be good that one feels refreshed after exercising than feeling sick and tired after working out.

I do not know when exactly did i fall in love with exercising but i know i did. On days which i did not workout, i will feel guilty and i will yearn for another session of work out.
Is like…not seeing your bf/gf and you yearn to see them and feel them (and i am talking about the bf/gf that you really love and not the ones you are sick of, haha) Sorry but that is like the nearest description.

Thus i really do not mind if i slim down or not. Of course, it is a bonus to slim down, i would Love to slim down after exercising so much. But if i dont, i will not feel so shortchanged because exercising is like love to me now, i do not lose out either way because i am doing something i love and this thing that i love does not harm my body like “smoking” (i used to love smoking). Instead, i stay healthier because of exercising.

It is a win win situation.

Oh, and yah, i kinda replaced Running with Swimming and Cycling. I cant really swim well but i can swim, i cant cycle (ride a bicycle) but i cycle on the machines in the gym.
I enjoy doing these  than running and thus i have not been running.

Honestly, if you ask me, i rather do the workouts i enjoy doing than forcing myself doing something i dread.
Is not  that i hate running, but i really love swimming and cycling more.
And for more intensive cardio workouts, i use the step up machines.
I believe that one will continue the workout regime and not quit halfway only if it is enjoyable.

3) as i mentioned, it is a win win situation thus it is not a waste of time. Maybe it is the age. But i really regret taking care of my body only now because no $ can buy health. Even though i am not sick and all now, but it is good to take care of our bodies earlier as prevention is better than cure.

As alot of you already knew, i have a very irritating colleague who diss me daily because i exercise. She would say the following:

1) Gym and trainning with a PT is a waste of $. My friend did that for 3 mths and he did not slim down at all.

2) You are eating clean everyday but you are still not seeing results, so what are you planning to do in the future? Not eating rice and noodles forever?

3) I sincerely think you are not slimming down.

4) Cycle again? how much can 20 to 30 mins of cycling help?

5) i used to swim and lift weights, cycle and run. I know how exercising doesnt help in slimming. Besides, you are doing less than what i used to do in the past, how to slim down?

6) i dont know how long more are you gonna take to slim down.

7) and many more…

Frankly, i am very offended. Yes, i am sucha person, if you call me petty, i am fine too. I am like that and i do not wish to hide. Yes, i know alot of people tell me to just ignore people like that. But i cant help feeling terrible because i have never met someone so negative, insulting, discouraging, and ignorant at the same time.

I have repeated myself umpteen times of how i love to exercise and how  i dont mind eating lesser rice (no human should eat large amount of carbo like rice and noodles anyway).
And i am doing all these now because i love to, i am willing to, NOT only because i am trying to shed fats.

Greenssss

Basically, i disagree with the saying Eat To Live. I do not think that one should only eat to live. There are so many varities of food in the world, there are so much good food and why should we just eat to live? That is a waste.
Food is not just fuel, it can be an indulgence and i feel we should indulge in good food, even fattening ones, but in moderate portions. Everything in life has to be moderate, too much of anything is not good.

Thus i do not think that eating clean should be a 24/7 routinebut it is a must. Likewise, fast food and food that is not so healthy should be consumed in moderate portions too. We shouldnt live to regret (of not eating nice food! )

 Mac Cheese (carbo + cheese + meat!)

She obviously doesnt get it. Or maybe she is just trying to be sarcastic as she lost 8kg due to TRA (a kind of fat burner, slimming programme by Nuskin).

I mentioned that i would try to take that TRA if i am damn rich as it costs 2k plus for 3months and thats the minimum fee to pay. It is effective and proven to be very good, it is not dangerous too. But i am not that rich.

Besides, i mentioned i love to do what i am doing now because Exercising boosts one’s confidence, and gives a kinda positive vibe to a person. Through exercising, i also learnt the logic of “Rome is not built in a day”. Everything has to happen slowly at its due time, depending on the effort you put in. Nothing comes easy. Seeing the muslces building on my arms, my triceps getting harder and more defined, i feel extremely proud of myself and i feel really good. ( i will take pictures the next time round to show, will also try to dig for ‘before’ pics and do a comparison).

To be honest, everyone knows and everyone says theories easily. I used to know the logic of “Rome isnt built in a day” but it is just saying. Not until i go through the various times of working out, then i realise that somethings cannot be rushed. I am experiencing the theory while others are just saying it using mouths. This logic applies very well in life, in alot of aspects. The confidence that exercise provides, makes me feel good about myself, makes me feel proud of the efforts i put in. The sweat, the tiny improvement of stamina and the tiny hardened muscles are all my achievements.

And no slimming programmes and pills can do that. I would love to lose more weight and shed more fats at the shortest time but i dont deny i love the feeling of working for what i want instead of short fixes. In chinese, we call it 苦尽甘来, working hard for something and reaping the rewards.

Well, i do not know how would i feel months later, it might be another short term interest of mine? Shrugs. But as long as i know, i am still yearning more of my cycling and swimming sessions. 😛

Actually, I didnt want to include this part as i really have no desire to talk about these people. But i couldnt help it, this crazy colleague was giving me 1 of those nonsense time again. I tried to ask God why am i in this place. Because my colleagues are really terrible people. They like to gossip and they like to judge, they like to insult and they like to hurt. Not only to me but towards each other, towards everybody.
Every single one of them, even the guys.

Women gossip and people think  that is detestable? Try knowing gossipy men in my company, they gossip about my attendance (due to my constant absence recently due to my genuine sickness and my mum’s hospitalisation issue), they gossip about this and that, they gossip about how thing are not done on my side (i am not defending myself but they should question my Boss why things are not done – it is due to the lack of budget and i am not responsible for that)

I know i have done my work, in terms of Marketing wise, i have done my part and proposed all that i can. Marketing isnt some admin work, i need funds to do my work, i need supportive team members to execute my ideas, to help in the operation and execution.  I have NONE and to make things worse, i have ignorant colleague correcting me when they themselves are making stupid judgement.

For eg. This colleague asked me to correct my spelling, he said: Val can u please check that typo?

I: what typo?

He: Staffs and not Staff, we have many staffs in the company.

I: there is no such word as staffs. It is like People, not “peopleS”

He gave a look and asked me in the most doubtful voice: Is it?

I: yah.

He smirked.

How rude is that right? I am ok if you are right and you correct me, but i am not ok when you yourself is wrong and you try to correct me. After i told you the truth, you disbelieve and shake your head STILL thinking that you are right.

I understand this but i am really not very happy over his ignorant opinion.
Sorry but i dont think he deserves to be called a ‘sheep’ either.

I think i need Grace. Tons of them. 😦

Y are all my colleagues like that???

1 says that exercise is a waste of time, it is not good to do exercise, it doesnt help to slim down and etc (honestly i really roll my eyes at these)

The other actually suggest me to correct “MY TYPO”?

I have more to share but sharing about them just makes me unhappy.

I really wonder why God put me here. I am miserable everyday. If not for the money and the plan i have on hand at the moment….

Sigh.

Well, to make myself feel better, at least Mum is discharged and is at home now. I hope she recover soon.

I am tired and i am tired of typing already. I will update soon and hopefully i bring good news in my next post.

Some Camwhore moments…

My Sunday swim at gf’s and visiting aunt after that. Photobomb by irritating sis.

I love my triple eye lid because Leslie has it too! Same eye too! Left side. 😛
Just Random.

Ok i like this picture. Thank you. 🙂
Pardon the basins.

Til then` God Bless

It is not emergency unless you are dying – Local hospital’s A&E

Hi everyone.

I am extremely tired and i think i am suffering from Fatigue.

The past few days were really challenging and i am really really drainned.

Firstly, i would really like to thank God  that Mum is feeling ok but i believe she can feel better.

I believe the hospital she stays in can be more responsible in providing safer and satisfying services.

Trust me, if i were to write down my experience with Singapore General Hospital, i might really include some unsightly crude words.

Really, pardon me.

But i was really really appalled by the service of sucha huge organization.

Thus i copied the feedback my little sis wrote to the hospital. You will also get a better idea as she is very detailed in writing this feedback.

We doubt it helps but we are waiting for the Hospital’s response.

Here you go:
About 2 weeks ago, I brought my mum to A&E after being referred by my family doctor due to her severe pain and internal bleeding of her right knee.

I can understand the waiting time, but not for the explanation and ambiguous diagnosis.

She was given a X-ray and was told to discharge shortly after being prescribed some painkillers, and we were told that if the pain occurs again, she may come in to A&E and see the doctor and following by warding my mum.

2 weeks later, my mum is still in pain and the painkiller doesn’t seems to be working either, so we brought her in to A&E again, as instructed, to see doctor and be warded for further investigation.
We were then being denied to let my mum to be warded.

The second time she went to A&E, the doctor just took 2 tubes of blood without telling us why, so we asked.
After gotten the answer, we were told to wait outside, and shortly after, my mum was told to discharge, with the cannula still plastered over at my mum’s brachial artery.

I felt that this shouldn’t be what a hospital should be doing, with the ambiguous explanation and service given. Nothing was done except being prescribed the same painkillers again and drawing out of 2 tubes of blood.
We have been rather patient with the staff till we realize we are just been told to wait aside again and again without telling us the reason again. To be discharged with the same painkillers again, which we have informed the doctor that the medicine aren’t doing anything for my mum;

1)same medicine was given again
2)the cannula is still plastered at my mum’s vein
3) Doctor did not explain anything or even diagnose her anything, all she did was based on the previous report to explain to us which we think that it doesn’t make any sense at all.

We supposed that A&E is a department where the patient will be further investigated, with clear instructions and diagnosis and explanation before one can be discharged, as the pain is not being made up, is urgent and requires immediate intervention and attention to the patient.
I believe the service can be made better.
I am writing this not only for my mum, and also hope that the quality and service can be improvised to build a better environment for all patients.

Honestly, if you want to hear from me, i would suggest that you should go to a private hospital if you are sick and if you can afford it. Many told me that i shouldnt complain because this is a government hospital to begin with, because they subsidize on the fees, their services will therefore be discounted  too.

I really understand this  is how it works. But this is Singapore. You do know which BIG shot visits this hospital whenever he is sick right?

Even if we cant be treated fairly and equally, i thought the basic level of service should be met.
The MOs (that attended to us) were young kids and they cant even speak properly and clearly (their replies were always “DONT KNOW”), some cant even speak proper English, some took patient’s blood without informing (even my GP can do better) some behave like very lost students when asked about patient’s conditions (fyi, they freaking shrugged away)

I understand that these Medical Officers have to start somewhere and we have to give them chances to, but at the expense of our patients? Really?

A&E means Accident and Emergency and having MOs like them around is really dire. I am not here to judge their skills and professions but they do not even possess basic courtesy? 1 of the MOs even snapped sarcastically at us.

Even my Malaysian colleague is shocked at what i went through, she said that she always thought that this kinda situation only exist in Malaysia.
Honestly, me too. I have never knew this can happen in Singapore.

Really feel so stressed running around to hospital n home with Sis, we are so tired. It doesnt help when the service at the hospital is at its lowest.
I am now considering various Insurance policies because i am really terrified with the experience i had  this time. If we can afford, or if the insurance policy we buy is flexible, i will go straight to a private hospital (touchwood! but i am saying if we are sick in future) anytime.

Vdates – End of May (and full of rantings)

Hi and in a blink of eye, 2013 is half gone.

I really hated the fact how time flies without me realizing. During my youngER days, each day is a dread and i do not know how to get past those days.

When i was in Primary school, i hated school because i was a dork and i was being bullied regularly.
The 6 years were terrible and each day was a struggle to me.

When i was in Secondary school, i have to worry if my Discipline master will catch my tinted hair, my not very long school skirts and basically all the other disciplinary problems lah. Thus the years crawled slowly and i cant wait to get into the society and work. (totally regretted having that thinking)

During Poly and Private Schooling days, i cant remember what happened but it didnt seem fast either.

Then it was those few years of feeling lost, not knowing what work to do, what job to get, what to do with life before i turned abit more serious at around 25 yo.

Those days of being lost and ‘useless’ really passed by very very slowly.

Recently, i have more plannings, more commitments and goals, time seems to fly its way at the fastest speed and it is not enough even if i am given 48hrs a day.

Sorry for growing up at a slower pace and at a later age. I am not sure how mature are my readers,  i am not sure who are you guys.
But do you also feel the same as me? Do you also feel that being committed and responsible for more things in life seems to make your days so short?

I only get to feel this way now because i really have alot of worries and things on mind, i really do not know how i manage to get pass each day in the past.

Anyway, back to vdates, my past week was TERRIBLE and i thank God it is over.

I dont even feel like starting but i guess i will have to.

Had another huge fight with my Family and this time round, it is MY FAULT. My sis said something unpleasant abt a relative and instead of being patient with her, i flared up and started to bang on things (tables,chairs, doors). Unbelievably mean of me.
I remember being very patient initially but i was just too outta control that night and i said nasty things and ran out of the hse in a fit of anger.

She was at fault for giving names to a relative  and i m very glad she realised it already but i was worse because i swear and cursed and i screamed at my Mum and her. I said alot of nasty things and i poured all my bitterness out.

Sometimes, i wish my sis can do that, so that her bitterness towards me and Mum can be confronted and dealt with. But nope, she doesnt and in the end, i was the 1 who did that. Damn.

I thank God i have gf with me, when i said the most nasty words tt hurt my Mum, gf was there talking to her. I really thank God that Mum also builds up her Faith and tried praying during such times. In the past, she wud just blame God.

Now, she would tell me: do u think this is spiritual attack?

I was like WOW MUM!

Mum prepared this for my Lunch. Looks sickly but it taste very good – it is Chicken Breast.

Ok, i din intent to put all the blame on Satan that idiot, i have my part to play for giving in to temptation (of anger) but i thank God for His faithfulness. He reconciled us back together and this time round, it is quicker than usual.

I apologized to Mum and poor Mum has to suffer all my nonsense and talk nicely to me. I really love her alot, and i really am willing to do anything for her. She really show me what is selfless love. How can anyone love me so much besides Jesus?

I did not imagine i would apologize to my sister but i eventually did.

Honestly, as much as i hate to admit, i am a rather prideful person. I have no issues of admitting wrong and saying thanks – but thats only to people i am not very familiar with. To closer friends and family members, i tend to have that nasty pride problem that hold me back from saying Thanks and Sorry. I do not know why but i am THANKFUL that i am learning how to get that pride issue aside.

From this incident, something in me vindicated me badly. Something, a voice (if you wana call it a voice) in me KEEPS telling me i am wrong.
I have no choice but to approach my sis and apologize to her.
She surprised me though, she did not say much this time except for admitting her own mistakes  (no defensive statements from her).

I then realized that actually Pride is like a heavy weight, it is extremely hard to handle as it stretches your muscles while holding them. But they are not that hard to let go, and once you let go, your muscles feel relaxed.

As of 3pm today, sis and i were chatting away like kids:

[2:51:54 PM] Valencia Lesley: hi MT
[2:51:56 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u

[2:52:16 PM] MT Cheng: …

[2:52:23 PM] Valencia Lesley: y?

[2:52:30 PM] MT Cheng: lol

[2:52:30 PM] Valencia Lesley: i tink despite u being a XXXX sometimes
[2:52:31 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u
[2:52:37 PM] Valencia Lesley: since young i bully u

[2:52:39 PM] MT Cheng: f off HAHA

[2:52:42 PM] Valencia Lesley: wen i teach u maths
[2:52:45 PM] Valencia Lesley: i not patient with u
[2:52:49 PM] Valencia Lesley: 1+1 = 2

[2:52:52 PM] MT Cheng: despite being XXXX. wth

[2:52:53 PM] Valencia Lesley: bt u were SO STUPID
[2:52:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: u say 3

[2:52:57 PM] MT Cheng: aiya still say

[2:53:00 PM] Valencia Lesley: then i ask again

[2:53:01 PM] MT Cheng: my maths not good.

[2:53:01 PM] Valencia Lesley: u say 4
[2:53:04 PM] Valencia Lesley: then u say 6

[2:53:09 PM] MT Cheng: SINCE WHEN I SAY that? HAHA

[2:53:09 PM] Valencia Lesley: i was lik WTF is wrong w u!??!
[2:53:12 PM] Valencia Lesley: 1+1 = 2 la?!??!?!
[2:53:18 PM] Valencia Lesley: wher the 4 6 3 come frm?
[2:53:33 PM] Valencia Lesley: HAHAAH bt i m ashamed tt i m so impatient with a small kid lik u
[2:53:35 PM] Valencia Lesley: so i am sorry
[2:53:36 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u
[2:53:43 PM] Valencia Lesley: n u said tt
[2:53:50 PM] Valencia Lesley: bc i rem clearly i scolded u say u stupid
[2:53:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: althou really abit stupid
[2:54:02 PM] Valencia Lesley: bt u were jus a kid
[2:54:03 PM] Valencia Lesley: i m sorry
[2:54:13 PM] Valencia Lesley: n i noe u are capable of bigger things
[2:54:19 PM] Valencia Lesley: so u r nt stupid ok

[2:57:31 PM] MT Cheng: haiz.
[2:57:39 PM] MT Cheng: i know im born smart

[2:57:44 PM] Valencia Lesley: … not really.

[2:57:46 PM] MT Cheng: but my talents are hidden
[2:57:48 PM] MT Cheng: HAHHA
[2:57:48 PM] MT Cheng: u guys didnt know

[2:57:52 PM] Valencia Lesley: lol!

[2:57:54 PM] MT Cheng: till now

[2:57:54 PM] Valencia Lesley: omg.

[2:57:55 PM] MT Cheng: well

[2:57:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: hahahhahah

[2:57:57 PM] MT Cheng: not so late

[2:57:57 PM] Valencia Lesley: WADEVER

[2:57:58 PM] MT Cheng: LOL!

[2:58:02 PM] Valencia Lesley: i m gona post this
[2:58:04 PM] Valencia Lesley: shit u

[2:58:06 PM] MT Cheng: WTF

[2:58:10 PM] Valencia Lesley: 😉

[2:58:11 PM] MT Cheng: HAHA
[2:58:15 PM] MT Cheng: blackmail
[2:58:19 PM] MT Cheng: can sue u for that
[2:58:19 PM] MT Cheng: haha

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHA

I was very happy and i am still happy. We are now planning for our first Family trip for Mummy’s Birthie! 😀

I will most prolly be away for Aug for Mum’s birthie and the Project i have with gf. I pray for Open doors of Opportunities from God and i see how He guide me step by step, small steps and big steps. I believe He has a plan for me (and gf) so i believe we will do well. Praise the Lord!

Went to visit Gf at the MBS suite and she bought bubbles for me! So happy! 😀
Chris and her (and my Mum) say that i am like a kid.

Then, before  May ends, i had an argument with Seven. I really do not think it is right to say it here but i also do not know if it is my fault.
I asked a few people about it and besides acknowledging tt i have a screwed up temper issue, the real problem here is not only my temper issue but a friendship issue.

Something is very wrong with the friendship.
Sometimes i feel that i am not being treated fairly in this friendship as her priority is no longer the friendship or something pure and fair. Her priority now is Gary, her beau, who happens to be a good friend of both of us too.
Hate to say this, i am not envy of her because after seeing what she is going through in this r/s, i really thank God i am single.
Not saying that she is suffering or whatever, that is not up to me to judge, but i am saying i wouldnt want to be in her position.
Hate to say this, i am not jealous at all but i do feel that the Seven i respect is now another person whom i might feel very …hard to find words.
I just feel that she changed and i can only say i am silly to expect from a human.
As much as she is very spiritual, kind, helpful and please-fill-up-the-list-with-all-the-good-virtue-pointers, she is still a human after all.
Why am i expecting her to be the same rational friend that held neutral stands that i once had?

I do not know what to do with the argument that we had, we basically did not talk after tt.
Knowing her well, she is not the least bothered because friendship, r/s, kinship and wadever ships to her are just secondary.
She told me she wouldnt even cry if someone close pass away. What do you think?
I know she is a rational person and some call her cold hearted. But i just thought it is not a problem for her to get over.

I did not tink of apologizing because i am still rather disturbed with what had happened. If doing something for me in the not so legal way is not possible, then why get me involved with the policy in the first place? Because even if i do not trouble Gary to help out, the whole thing is still Not legal.
So whether you get Gary to help me or not, you are still involving me in a NOT legal thing what. Why do you have to portray how righteous Gary is then? I mean, if he and you are so righteous, then why are you all doing the same not very legal thing for others?
I am not very sure about how insurance policies work thus you cant expect me to know everything. Is like, do you need to use  the word “Fraud” on me, hello?

Ok thats so much i am revealing, i am not gona get anyone into trouble by saying more, if you are smart, you would have guessed it.

As for me, i understand that when one apologize, it doesnt always mean that one is wrong, it is sometime for the r/s.
But for this case, i really do not know what to do, apologize for my attitude perhaps? But not for her selfish thoughts for Gary before me. I understand he is her beau but i feel crappy inside me.

Would also like to say this, yes i admit i kinda expect everyone to behave like me and i am really trying my best to change this very BAD habit of mine. Of course, i cant expect everyone to be fair and not 重色轻友 (the 4 chinese characters means one that cares more for his or her beau so much to the extent of neglecting friends)

I have my moments of being sucha bad person before too. I was busy being depressed with my last Ex, and i neglected Regine (which also made her very bitter towards me even after so long. She recently confessed that to me. Yes, how nice to have family arguments, frenship problems all tog right?)

But honestly Regine, i hope you see this and think about it, i have helped you many times before which i hate to claim credits for those times, you helped me multiple times before too. But you do realize that you ‘abandoned‘  me for some guys before too right? You do realize that as much as Adrian was a real jerk, i was blind that time and i wanted to marry him and thus i was depressed like mad when he abused  me and betrayed me during that time right? Y did you hate me so much for that 1 year of me abandoning you? I basically abandoned myself back then, dont you realize? SIGH.

I cant expect everyone to be as ‘tough’ & ‘cool’ as me, but u know how i cringe whenever Seven does the doll voice to coax Gary each time we are out. I mean, ok fine…couples like to do these lovey dovey things but i am not invisible, if you want to do all these, perhaps i shouldnt join the outing…right? It is really awkward for me.

I am a terrible person lah. I can only get along with certain people because these people accept me and i can accept them fully with no frustrations.
Terrible right?

I wouldnt be like others bc i wouldnt find excuses to defend myself saying i am cool because i am who i am. I am indeed terrible, that i admit.
I know i have been told that the real problem is me because i cant get along with people.
I agree, sadly.

I am trying to accept people and i am learning but i am still not able to do it. I think i need time and His Grace.

While typing this, my colleague who lost 7kg from the Nuskin TRA programme, came and remarked on my diet sarcastically AGAIN.

She lost alot of weight and it is obvious, from 75, 76kg to 68kg now? Well i do not know if she lies about her weight but from her shape, i can tell she lost weight. Good for her but she has been pushing me to buy that TRA thing for the longest time even after i told her i have commitment issues as i am with the Gym now and i am saving up for stuffs.

I would love to try TRA, why not right? I wana slim down too. I gained like 10 kg in a year of stuffing everything into my mouth last year.
But i would love to know i work for what i want, i cant deny i have fallen in love with exercising – Cycling, Swimming, Stretching and etc.
She pities me CONSTANTLY and say i am very 可怜 (pitiful), but i do not feel i am suffering.
She dissed my exercise regime, i was like…wads wrong with exercising???? Yes i would try TRA if i can afford to (it is $2k over for 3mths)
BUT i would still exercise EVEN if i am doing through that TRA crap.
I thought i made myself very clear already.
She dissed my healthy fruits and salad diet because she can eat fried chicken chops and other fried food because she has that TRA thing.
But why cant i eat healthy instead? Besides slimming down, i would like to be healthy too what?!
All those pills and supplements makes one slim down in a rapid rate, if i say i do not want that, i am lying.
But i also treasure my workout times, i love to work out and tone my muscles, i love to eat healthy now.

Nothing wrong right?

Used to think tt 15mins on the cycling machine is crazy but i did 45mins ytd.

I honestly dont really care what you will say or dissed abt cycling because i have alot of people telling to me that it doesnt wrk if you wana slim down and etc
No doubt, i hope it works but if it doesnt, i will still love cycling. Just because you do not have the heart to cycle or cant put your lazy bum on that machine, just because you cant put in effort to exercise and you dissed me of the exercises i do… thats very mean.
Dont be surprise because there are alot of people like that around. They love to bring others down because they cant do it. They are hoping you are as lazy as them.

Dearie Mummy prepared apples for me for lunch. 3 small apples! Yummy.

 

So you see, here i am complaining about another person. Terrible right?

I know I know and I know. I know i should learn to accept people and see their Good besides their Flaws. Because i wouldnt want others to see my flaws only.

Just this Morning, i bumped into Alex – my churchmate and his wife. I said hi and smiled, the wife looked away as usual whereas he greeted me happily and asked me how am i.
You see, Alex is a wonderful man, he is humble and helpful to everyone. I wouldnt say the same of his Wife because she is from HK and many told me she has a different culture background. (LAME EXCUSE FOR HER RUDENESS I KNOW, i rolled my eyes when the people told me that too)

Basically, She chooses her friends carefully. (even her husband says that)
I do not know if it is a bad thing because frankly, you cant blame her as you see, i choose friends too. (read above and you know what are the people i really wouldnt like to be friends with)

But i do think that as much as you choose friends, you have to have Manners lah. People say hi to you, smile at you, but you glared and look away?

I might not be AS RICH as those that you see in church (whom you have to suck up to), i might not be as pretty as your expectation, i might not be wearing Pradas and LV, I might not be the most spiritual gal in the church.

BUT I HAVE NEVER OFFENDED YOU IN ANYWAY!? I EVEN OFFERED YOU DRINKS, I TRIED TO GET FOOD FOR YOU WHEN WE WERE DINNING TOGETHER, I TRIED TO BE NICE.

I am not what you expect me to be and you can Don’t Friend Me , but you have NO MANNERS.

Hongkong teach you to be like that meh? Or Jesus taught you that? (ok Jesus will never teach her that i am sure)

So my main point here is, i wana whine about people who irritated me for the past week. Nothing preachy. Just pure rantings.

Anyway, back to what i was saying, i was a terrrible person because my attitude to people depends on theirs to me. This is not totally wrong but it kinda reflects my low EQ. I cant help it. I am trying hard to change.  I have no excuses for myself but i can tell you…it is NOT EASY.

God have Mercy on me.

It is Fri tomorrow and a new Month is coming. The upcoming months will be very challenging and i am glad i have my God, my family and gf with me. A BIG THANKS to gf for realizing my dream a bit faster for me, and she has been very supportive too. Love her.
I also wana thank Chris for ‘lending’ gf to me for this tough period. 🙂

I love Mummy and my Sis, i really pray that they can be healthy and safe 24/7. (Random but mean it)

Ok Anyway, the coming weeks i will be really busy so i thought i better blog today before i go MIA for sometime.

Someone asked if i will still be blogging more, i dont know man.It depends.If i am free and i feel like it, why not?

If i am lazy and all (hope you know that blogging is rather tedious. thank God i am just a normal blogger that blogs for i duno who.
Imagine the stress of the ‘famous bloggers’ of having to commit?? Meh)

Ok, i gtg. Good weekend everyone~ Till next post and God bless.

p/s: i hope you are not surprise by the exceptional huge amount of rantings in this post. I really feel i have to let out the steam. I really am trying my best to be good but i really do not know where else can i vent out. I am human but that is not an excuse for my errors i know. Pray for me?

🙂

Aplenty Updates – (Besides loving others, one has to appreciate herself)

Hi!

I am writing about random stuff today.  (Warning: it is actually VERY wordy)

First and foremost, i would like to talk about the dress i am selling.

Information and pictures as below:

Brand: Love Bonito, CNY Collection Erving Dress – Sold out on Love Bonito Website

Size: M measures 16″ PTP, 12″ to 18″ waist, 23″ hips, 33.5″ down.

Color: Yellow/ Lemon

Price: $30 Brand New, Never worn before. (Original retail price on Love bonito is $32)

 

SOLD
Additional description:
Highlight the number’s unique detail with sparkly embellishments, making your chic getup hard to miss! Fully lined; cotton polyester material. Slightly sheer; especially for White (comes with petticoat). Key hole opening at back with button fastening. Elastically banded at waist. Made of crepe chiffon.

 

Photos and information courtesy of http://www.lovebonito.com/

The Yellow piece was a gorgeous one. I really like it  alot. But i reckon it was an impulse purchase because the moment i received the physical piece, i realise it is really NOT ME at all.
Chiffon and all, i dont really like it afterall but i still thought it is a very pretty dress, the color is so awww, it just makes anyone feel a tad lighter in this hot weather.

I honestly contemplated for very long, (2days? is long enough for me) before making the decision to sell it.
It is so new and never been worn before.

But anyway,  i have other clothes for CNY and they are mostly working attires (sadness) and honestly, i didnt buy much clothes this year, because CNY has been boring though it is 1 of my fav festivals. I do not have much relatives to visit, friends are mostly bz visiting, so i doubt i m hanging out much, thus CNY is just an excuse for me to shop, n i intend to stop using this excuse to shop so much this time.

As i mentioned above, the original price Love Bonito is selling @ $32 and i am letting it go at $30, it is brand new, no defects, never even tried on before.

If you are interested, leave a comment or email me @ valenciafaithz.z@gmail.com

Next up:

I have been taking care of myself recently. Not that i have been torturing myself in the past (come to think of it, i kinda tortured myself in the past. LOL)

“Like How?” – you ask.

Well, i used to party non stop and my highest record was 6 days a week, sometimes 7 days straight, but i was really young back then, maybe 20 or younger.
I remember during that time, Romance, Fun, Parties, all activities that are not constructive appeal so much to me.
Drinking from the bottle itself is like heaven, smoking non stop is nothing unhealthy in my eyes, it is just for me to catch / absorb more air into the throat and feel damn shiok  (twisted logic and i feel like slapping myself now).
I DONT do drugs though. I was offered drugs since 14year old but i refused to touch it because i know i am quite weak in disciplining myself. Like smoking, some people can control themselves, and not get addicted but i got addicted heavily ever since i started smoking at 14yr old (i am 27 now and  thats 13 years of smoking). I refused to touch drugs because i do not want to get addicted to it, i know there are drugs that will not get you addicted but honestly, i think that ADDICTION DOESNT necessary mean that YOU ARE ADDICTED TO THE PRODUCT ITSELF, ADDICTION CAN BE YOU ARE ADDICTED TO THE HABIT.

Anyway, more on ADDICTION later.

Back to the Unhealthy (old) me. Yea, i lost alot of weight back then and i wonder why, perhaps i was always emo after all the drinking, and the bad relationships i had with the wrong people. It was just Shit lah.
I smoked more than i eat, i think. I love the slim body back then but i seriously look tired and disgusting.
However, because my skin is still Okay as per se, thus i always conceal and hide through cosmetics, not really thick make ups but normal make up.

I forgot for how long have i been leading that kinda life and to be honest, it was tiring. Physically/ Mentally and Spiritually.
So this was around 2000 – 2006? I seriously cant rem!

Then, i got into much stable relationships and i party lesser or infact, i kinda got myself outta the party scene.

But, those r/s didnt last long, sad but true, although i was MORE serious (i am serious all the time but by 24, i am almost thinking of ‘settling dwn’ and marriage might be in consideration)  in the r/s when i was older ( i think i am around 24 then).
It was never 1 party’s fault, i was not suitable for the exes and neither are they worth loving and blahblah.
So you know, i heard this from some1 really successful – the most difficult thing on earth is finding the right person as a lifetime soulmate and partner. Thus, despite my (you may say many) failed relationships, i tried not to blame anyone or myself.
Year 2008??

After ending those r/s, you must be thinking “Valencia must be back to those crazy party days again”
Nope i didnt really return to those party days but i kinda worked with a nightlife company.
People who know me will know which company is it and i am always at Clarke Quay, that is.
Although i market (marketing)  the different F&B outlets and Entertainment Clubs, i am NOT ONLY required to work in the day but i am also required to hang around the clubs at night, sometimes, till wee hours. Needless to say, i have countless nights of spending time entertaining and Drinking is inevitable.
Sometimes my mum would even ask me “what are you wrking exactly, y r u drunk and all?” HAHAHA
And of course, Smoking is inevitable too, especially when you are a smoker and  the business associates smoke too.

That was when i was single, i spent all my time at work and my ex colleagues smoke alot too (most of them). So, what i did besides working hard was Smoking, Partying, Drinking and it repeated for approximately 1 year.
This was in 2009 (approx).

Then, i got attached to the philandering ex bf Adrian and i guess you know what happened after that. I got abused and all for another 1 year.
I was already looking like a zombie by then (according to my mum LOL) I didnt sleep well, didnt eat well, i smoked alot and i have bruises all over me and i really dont recognise myself.
If i were to see Me now – the Valencia 1 year ago , I really will cry for myself.
Year 2010- First half of 2012

So…the above account for the  unhealthy me for the pass…wait, i have to count because it was the longest time and it felt like forever….
Ok, the Unhealthy me for the pass 13 years (i reckon i should start counting from 14 because i started smoking back then).

Let me do a short summary of my health and well being after the 13 years of crazy torture to myself.

Hair – Dry and frankly, i do not know how my lifestyle can affect the hair but i reckon my hair was forever stained with smoke and smelling bad back then.

Face – Worst part of the body. WORST. DRY LIKE CORNFLAKES (dont ask me y cornflakes. i just feel so) The Skin peels like mad, dry to the max and nothing more than just being Dry. SIGH. Now you know what they say about smokers’ skin condition? IT IS SO TRUE. YELLOWISH AND JUST DAMN DRY.

Body – Weight infatuated. Fat, lost weight and then Fat again. Tired of all these.

Mental – Totally Depressed. Severe Depression, because of the stress from work, the miscom in family, the hurtful relationships. I was referred to Shrinks (my family were very very very protective of me, they know that i am not unsound, they know that i was just too stress at that moment)

I am 27 but i already felt like 37 after going through all that  physical and mental torment.

So what now? Yeap, i have been taking care of myself, at least, for the past few mths and esp the recent 1 mth of 2013. haha.
I am not writing about some 2013 resolutions because i mentioned i do not believe in resolutions. If a person wana b better, it can be anytime and not relying on making some resolutions that most cant keep.

After 1 decade of crazy torture to myself, i finally started to Love myself aplenty and be more careful with the way i live.
I know it is kinda late as i am already over mid twenties.
The smart and disciplined ones started maintaining a healthy body since 21 or even teenage.
But BETTER LATE THAN NEVER.
I said that because i still see or know people who party non stop, drinking non stop, smoking and doing whatever that harm the body non stop at late 20s to even 60s. OMG PLS.

But anyway, i got this message nagging me during the end of 2012. Infact, i have this naggy voice telling me to quit smoking since 2011. But i brushed it aside because it was impossible to me back then. I was so heavily addicted, without cigarettes- i cant sleep, i cant do anything and i will feel frustrated.
Previously, I even threw my stuff around, flaring up because i couldnt find a lighter to light the cig.
That was how extreme i was and that was  how much i would do for a cig.
I remember that i was very broke at one point of my life, i only have $ enough for 4 packets of rice (which can last me for 2 days!) OR 1 packet of cigs.
I bought the cigs without thinking at all.  Back then, i can do without food but i cant do without cigs.
Again, thats how much i would do for cigs, and thats how deeply addicted i am.

So anyway, back to the naggy voice…It was very soft and honestly, the normal Valencia you know – WILL NEVER SAY YES TO QUIT (smoking).
I have discouraged i-cant-rem how many friends from quitting (i was a crap, i noe)
Thus, i do not know who spoke that idea of ‘quitting’ into my heart and brain and it turned into a burden. TOTAL BURDEN.

The voice was getting louder and louder till i cant take it and i just told myself in Dec 2012 that i will STOP COMMITTING MYSLF TO SMOKING. Yeap, Stop smoking lah.

Do you think i can do it? I tell you the truth, it was DIFFICULT AS I DONT KNOW WHAT, for the 1st week. During the first 3 days, i almost wanted to …i didnt know how to not smoke. Really, i do not know how to not smoke, just like you asking a non smoker to smoke, he/she wun know how to smoke or how to light the cig and how to inhale and exhale right?
I really do not know what to do without smoking. The worst parts were after meals, the morning sticks and the sticks before sleep. TERRIBLE.

I can assure you, it is not easy, those that say it is easy are just bullsh*tting because they are proud.
HAHA. Ok lah, my Personal experience was really bad and it was not easy at all.

Those Preachy talks about “if you have determination to do something, you can and will do it”…
But, as cliché as it sound, it really work that way.
NOTHING, and i mean it. NOTHING help if you do not really WANT TO DO IT.

I dont know how i did it, but i can be very frank with you, even up till now, i still have that urge, now and then. ESPECIALLY when i am feeling upset.

Maybe, just maybe, God really knows how to help me. Even if it means, using my weak point.
Why i say that? Because i am super LAZY. I am really super LAZY, i shall not explain but trust me that i am super lazy. (rem i said something about self-discipline?) Ok, 1 eg. I dont like to walk down to the shop to buy food for lunch, so most of the time, i just dont eat or during weekends,  i find food at home to feed myself.  I am lazy to even walk that few steps to the Hawker.

Thus, the moment i finished smoking the last stick i had, i never buy another box of Ciggies.  Because i am lazy. I am lazy to walk to any Mama shop or 7-11 to buy. Not only that, it helps too when i see myself less broke, and i can buy more dresses since i stopped buying ciggies.
I HONESTLY FEEL PROUD OF MYSELF AND NTG ELSE. HAHA

I can’t list the whole list of Pros (of quitting) but you already know the Cons of smoking yea. Everyone will eventually die 1 day, thus many people smoke and enjoy ‘the-moment’ now. These people (i am not being judgemental because i truly understand what a smoker feels and think) have the YOU-ONLY-LiVE-ONCE mentality and smoking seriously is like a “frustration-quencher” (watermelon juice- a thirst- quencher analogy because usually you feel better after smoking if you are upset) I really understand all that from a Smoker’s point of view. But there are def more pros than cons, you knew it.

Health: I dont know about you (if you smoke), but for me, i do not want to risk dying younger than i should because i really really treasure my life now more than b4, i treasure my family alot to die young.

Image: I do not want to die ugly.
Smoking causes stains here and there, teeth and nails and it makes a person smell so bad in and out. Thats enough to cause inferiority.
I also tend to hide in a corner to smoke most of the time because i really hate the smoking image. No matter how pretty a woman can be, the moment she holds a cig, it changes everything. (Tell me it doesnt? Tell me any guy that will feel proud bringing u back to their parents? Tell me you smoke infront of your friends’ parents and expect the parents to like you? )

Mental: I do not want to feel ugly.
Most of the times, i dont even dare to admit to people that i smoke but people usually smell it. I am so embarrassed and ashamed (dont ask me why am i ashamed, i just dont feel proud)

Financial: I want to be richer and i am getting more and more cautious as i am older because my savings now aint the amount i desire to have.
Again, not sure about you but i spend ard hundreds per mth and honestly, with these $, i see myself doing more constructive things. Like- dolling myself up because at my age, i want to maintain looking youthful and i do not want to resort to botox, thus i rather spend on skincare and more clothes.

Yep. I didnt break this news earlier on because i am always a person who speaks after action. I will only announce it after i have succeeded doing it. It holds more weight though i am not trying to convince anyone Nor impress anyone but i just like to do it before saying it.

However, as i confessed, i still have the urge to smoke sometimes, though not often.
I did accepted 2 sticks from a friend who offered (and yea, i gave in to temptation then) after not smoking for a month.
But i am still trying right? So please dont judge! But you can pray for me though. 🙂

I managed to be free from the addiction not only due to my own determination but also, i owe this to God. I prayed to Jesus, so many times during those tough times, i prayed for Him to take away my urge and honestly, i really do not remember having much urges.
Of course, there are people tt commented tt i always use the name of Jesus too often and too much. Well, thats my belief, and i do believe He did help me along because whenever i spend time praying the urge away, i feel i do not need a stick at all. Call it psychological effects but i believe in my heart, it is God that helps me along 🙂 Thank God!

Remember what i said about Addiction? I had very bad flu and all for the 1st 2 to 3 days, i felt sick during that few days of withdrawal symptoms.
But trust me, after  all the so-called after-effects, it is no longer the nicotine nor cig itself that holds u back.
It is your Habit, It is Yourself.

I always believe it is easy to break addiction to a product (Unless you are talking about Heroin) but it is NOT Easy to break a Habit.
Alot of people said that they are addicted but i personally feel that they do not know what they are addicted to. Are they addicted to Cigarettes or are they addicted to Smoking?
Cigarette is a product while Smoking is an action, a habit.
Thus, when you say you are addicted, you must be aware that you are addicted to a Habit and Not the product.
I mean, you seldom hear people say “i am addicted to cigarettes”. All of the time, it is “i am addicted to smoking” Right?
And since it is a habit that you are addicted to, you must be prepared to be strong and much stronger mindset is needed to cut this nasty habit away!

I did not eat those sweets, i did not use any nicotine pad, i never chew on any gums. I just bought a Vicks Inhaler (as below) and inhale if i feel the urge. But i did not want to start another addiction thus i try not to use it so often and yea, i kinda stopped using it. I just used it during the initial difficult stage.

In conclusion, i make use of everything to break a habit. Vicks inhaler, prayers, etc. Oh, i also try to chat with Mum to distract myself, initially, it was kinda deliberate and whenever u are doing anything deliberately, it is gona remind you of what you are trying to stay distracted from.
But, as time passes, it turned into a new habit and before you know it, your old habit is being replaced, gradually. Sounds easy? But i struggled for around a month. 30days.

It is never easy to quit, but Quoting what Gary told me
“never tell yourself you are quitting because it is human nature  that quitting is hard, quitting anything is hard.
Just tell yourself that you are no longer a smoker, you dont smoke.”

Some might think we are playing with words here but the difference is really huge because the word ‘Quitting’ is indeed intimidating.

If you are thinking of cutting this habit, I hope i help abit by penning down my personal experience of cutting cigarettes.

All i can say is, i have stop buying Ciggies (and nope, i dont go around asking for ciggies even though my current colleague smokes too) and
I AM NOT COMMITTED TO SMOKING
(i used to have this commitment, this committed r/s with ciggies, which also means that i will look for it, like how a gf will look for her bf. i will never abandon it and i will smoke wenever i am sad or happy. similar to how a good friend will share her good and bad times with her best friend).
Yep, i am no longer tied to,controlled by or bonded to the Cigarrettes Nor the action – Smoking.
I never never experience such freedom for 13 years, which is estimated 4745 days.
I wont say i am very healthy now but at least i am healthier than before, i get to make the choice of whether to accept an offer from a friend OR NOT accepting. You see, cigarettes CANOT control me anymore, i am so strong that i do not need something deadly to control me anymore. I control my own mind and thinking.
I do not need to be committed to Malborooooo Nor Nex Chill (cigs brands)

Btw, i went Cold Turkey because i personally dont believe in cutting down and etc. I tried cutting down and thats just crap to me, i will never stop smoking if i do not cut it off completely.
You cant say you will not have sex after foreplay right?
You cant say you will not eat the fried chicken after frying the chicken instead of steaming it right?
Point is: You run away from Temptation and Not resisting and coming near contact to it.

“Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart.”
2 Timothy 2:22 New International Version (NIV)

So, btw, smoking isnt very cool nor in the trend nwadays ar? Dont know why but i realise the trend now has changed. Smoking used to be cool (to some) but not anymore – seriously.

I did not write about what harm will be done to each organ in the body – hearts, lungs, throats, noses and etc… because honestly, as a smoker previously, i dont care about all that, i only know it is bad for myself but i still do it. It is a chore to read abt all those. But i will include this helpline for you although i saved the number but i did not call them because i manged to come out of it before i even call.

Monday to Friday – 8.30am to 5.00pm
Saturday – 8.30am to 1.00pm

QuitLine
Call 1800 438 2000 (Toll-free)

Hmm,  thats 1 thing off my list, 1 burden off my mind.

Next up: The body.
The body needs abit of exercising now even though i managed to get the shape back recently but i am still not as slim as before (when i was way younger, i was so skinny)
I am not Fat now, i lost weight, but i can do better, will blog more on this next time. I ought to do some workout and as usual, i will not be revealing much till after i have done it. But hints: I will prolly sign up classes that allow me to moves around and kicks around or dance around like mad! HAHAAH
Also, it is for fitness purposes lah, besides being trim, i hope i can be fitter too.

Face: I dont do facial because it is expensive and i know it does help but honestly, my skin is really quite good, according to docs, skincare specialists and friends. Thank God for that, and i dont waste $ buying packages for Facials but perhaps is time to do so…
I never put products on my face, not for the past 27 years. I know it is A MUST to slap on toners and moisturizer nightly and daily and religiously.
BUT I HAVE NEVER DONE ALL THAT till recently. Because i realised that i am reaching 30.

I mean, in all honesty, i am not exactly old but i am not teenager nor m i in the early twenties. I want to maintain looking good and even though i might not look 30, i dont want to risk looking 30. Not for anyone this time, not for Men nor friends but i feel good when i look good.
IT IS FOR MYSELF.

Thus, recently i tried SK2, i have 2 bottles of their sample (tell me small sample bottles dont work and i will ask u to talk to my hand because if it doesnt, tell me why they invent sample bottles). Moreover, i used it for around a mth+. More than enough time to tell the effects if any.
It doesnt wrk for me though. I heard alot of good reviews from others but maybe is just not suitable for me.

I tried Bio Essence. It used to work but it doesnt really bring the glow to my face. My face is really dry to an extent. Sigh. Big Sigh.
Yes, although i have no pimples and i can count with 1 hand, hw many times i actually have pimples in my 27 yrs of life. My skin is extremely dry (thus no pimples) and it turns flaky most of the time. My skin peel off itself and i cant even apply make up, i already stopped using powder and choose BB cream instead but it just doesnt sit well on my face and my whole face just look terribly flaky usually.

It is very sad whenever my skin peel off or feels tight and dry. I would try to slap on masks (sis  got them frm TW and i will use them) and usually it works but i guess as time passes, it kinda lost it effects.

Desperate and din know what to do, Sis pass me a bottle of HaDa LaBo. She used it but have stopped since i dont know when. A bottle so big and she only used 1/3 of it. “i shall just give it a try, no harm” i thought. Afterall, they say in their ad that it will : 锁住一个海洋 (lock an ocean) HAHA

I must say i am amazed by it because my sis told me it is not expensive but the moment i slapped it on, i feel it hydrates my skin instantly.
I have been using it since Sunday, it is the 3rd day today and my skin is so bouncy, so hydrated, so firm (although i dont know why it feels firm because it is supposed to hydrate). I feel so good applying make up or even when i dont apply make up, i feel very good because there is a glow on my face.
Applying make up seems easier and faster, and the skin is so silky smooth. Now that i am typing this, i am feeling & touching my face (sounds psycho again but i am really doing it). It is VERY SMOOTH. If it is not baby skin, it at least has to be a toddler’s skin. Or you can describe as egg shell. glowy and smooth.
– No Flaky Skins
– No weird bumps and ugly pores problem
JUST WHITE SNOW SKIN. Looks so much healthier too!

In Just 3 Days.

I am NOT PAID to do any ad nor reviews for Hada Labo but i sincerely want to share here with readers about my personal experience because i am SO HAPPY that my face is so silky smooth now. I always have good skin as mentioned, but i have never experience the glow nor the flawless smooth skin texture before, never before (please exclude baby and toddler’s times).

Now i am happy that i finally found the right product for me!
Having said that, it works for me but it might not work for you as my Sis didnt like it cos she has oily skin and she feels uncomfy applying this.
So, result varies for individual. I shall browse their website for more products after finishing this post…

S_ ** users, time to ditch that expensive bottle of saliva (smells like it) and you know what is a better alternative! Really!

Above image and information, courtesy of http://www.hadalabo.com.sg

Well, i kinda spent 2 hours on this post. Terrible, i initially wanted to just upload my new picture and do some simple updates… never knew it wud be so long and naggy! If you are still reading, well thanks! Haha. Because i am lazy, i never wana do any review or beauty posts but since i am at this topic of well-being….might as well?

As for the Hair, picture below will do the talking. I personally like it alot, 10 outta 10 people commented tt i look younger than before. I feel  i lost 5 years of age aft the haircut and well, i love it. However, it is pissing me off gradually as i have to blow straight the hairends every morning if not i will look like an Octopus (it curls outwards and it is not right)

Thus, i am heading over to Bbra’s to get it permed. Yes, i am gona perm it. I am praying that i wont look old because you know how curls can make a person look older.
But i trust Bbra will do a good job for me, fingers crossed!
So before it is permed, take a look at it while it is straight! 4 mre days to perm!

 

You may check out the skin’s condition. Both pictures- no make up. Zero make up. However 1st pic was filtered. 2nd pic is Raw.

p/s: i do not have before and after photos for my skin. My hp was faulty for the past 1 week. and i couldnt take any decent photos, moreover, the skin conditions cant be seen on pictures. It is just not obvious because i do not have acnes nor holes to start with, it is just the texture of the skin that has improved tremendously. I also do not have a picture of me before the haircut but i guess you can imagine lah, since i always post long hair pics previously. The phone is looking good, not faulty anymore but not as perfect as before. Sigh, hope it will not disappoint me again.

Managed to retrieve a picture of me having long hair over Insta for comparison (uploaded6.30pm 29/1/13):

Before

After

p/s p/s: gonna celebrate Sis’s bday this Sunday and bringing Mum to town to shop this Sat. can’t wait and then it will be CNY already. Happy CNY in advance!

p/s p/s p/s: “Besides loving others, one has to appreciate herself”
this was quoted from Leslie Cheung (my fav artiste and the late HK superstar).
This sentence also sums up the reason for this lengthy post. If you love yourself, you will find yourself being loved by many. If you love yourself, you will feel happy everyday. I have to remind myself that i Love myself, and because i love myself, i do not want to be inferior and i do not need people to label me. I can do things i want to do, i can make myself happier and healthier and i can show myself i can be happy despite situations.
I do not need to rely on anyone.

人除了要懂得怎去爱人，最重要是要懂得怎样去欣赏自己。- Leslie Cheung