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Archive for the ‘Personal Well Being’ Category

Vdates – October Fantastic Baby Edition

IMG_20131001_2Hi!

Happy Monday! I am dozing off after the crazy amount of workout ytd and 1/2 of the atarax.
Actually, i have been deprived of sleep since Friday. FML!

YAWNS!!!!
Ok, before anything, i would like to share my very first Korean POP song.

LOL!

I didnt even know they are called the Big Bang until my little sis told me ytd (we were dancing to this song for Zumba).
At first, i was like “WTF? Y KPOP AH?”

My sis screamed with excitement. I stared at her. She was so excited for K-POP. Goodness.
I dont fancy and i wont be keen in KPOP at all.
Sorry KPOP fans, i dont mean to offend, but i really do not know how to appreciate lah, sorry. I old liao, so i am very “evergreen-ish” LOL

But i must admit that i am addicted to this song, prolly due to the dance. HAHA.
Sometime back, i was asking my sister “eh who is G dragon ar? which band is that ar? y got so many de, y gt Big Bang, gt G dragon, gt don’t know what Tarsha or wadever “(sorry, i really do not know how to spell the right name, if i spell any name wrongly, my bad!)

Sister: G Dragon is 1 of the members in Big Bang.

I: FML. U mean it isnt a band?

Sister: Nope, he is in Big Bang.

LOL! Is this generation gap? I was like…shit, i am really sounding OLD now.  But why does people actually like these Korean boy bands ar?
I was looking at the MV for the 13832820 time and i still do not find them cute AT ALL leh?
Ok, there is this blue hair dude with green eyebrows, he looks ok.
Sis say his name is TOP, and is her fav guy in the group. Right.
But the rest are like….cute meh?
I even asked her to please point out G dragon to me, as i was asking over Line, (an app on iphones and android) all she can tell me was “he is the most skinny dude”

I: The long hair on one side guy ar?
Sister: yea.

OMG, why would anyone think this is cute ar?!

Ok, i better stop here. I am sorry Kpop fans, i am really old already, cant blame ah, i am just not appreciative but i really  think the music is very addictive. Haha, and very nice to dance along too!

I also admire the fact that they are so creative in their appearances and make up, so yah.
Hope that make up the fact that “i do not know how to find them cool/cute.”  -_-

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Eh, who is G Dragon again??? Which one???? There is no one with long hair in this pic leh!

Ok, so much for Big  Bang and Kpop. Haha, as i was saying, i had my first Zumba lesson ytd with Sis and GF. It was mad fun. But Gf didnt like it much. Both sis and i were enjoying so much n i am yearning for  more. 1 hr passed by so quickly. It was really fun, we danced to different genres of songs, and of course, 1 of which was the 1 above, that was my first true ‘interaction’ with Kpop HAHAH!
Actually not exactly, just that i danced to it for the 1st time, Sis plays Kpop all the time at home and i just roll my eyes everytime.
We also tried street jazz, hip hop, reggae, disco, and many others. I was sweating like a pig and it was really fun, cant wait for the next lesson! 😛

Because the GF wasnt really enjoying, so we accompanied her for her fav Body Combat lesson, and you know what, i was so damn sure i cant even complete the class because it was already mad  tiring after 1 hr of non stop dancing.
But i did! All of us survived the Body combat lesson and i am extremely proud of myself.
Looks like my stamina is catching up and i am getting fitter! HAHA.

Before that, i was telling GF that i will never complete the Body Combat lesson because of 2 reasons:
1) It killed me last week and i sprained every part of my legs
2) After 1 hr of Zumba, i think i will prolly die  there if i continue with Body Combat. It was a back to back lesson, immediately after the Zumba, Body Combat continues.

But we did it! Pats on my own shoulder. 🙂  Did it.

You see, i mentioned before that Exercising really makes 1 very motivated and makes 1 understand that NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE.
Alot of times, we give up when we are nearly there, but if we endure that bit more, we will reach there!

Anyway, i have been pushing myself to work out recently as i was getting complacent. But thank  God i found new classes like Zumba and etc to keep me going! It is no longer just cycling and stepping machines, they are rather boring to me now.
Also, i have been lifting weights to tone those flabby arms and working on the various machines to tone the fat thighs. They are not skinny but they are not that flabby 😡 But….

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Please ah, this picture is definitely edited. If not my skin wudnt be that smooth looking.
It is filtered like crazy. But with phone app, not photoshop. i STILL do not know how to use PS. -_-
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Still a long way to go and i really enjoy sweating, and will continue exercising! I am also on a program that helps to build up my metabolism, aids reducing Visceral fats, (please take some time to click on the link of Visceral fats as it is apparently more dangerous than the normal fats that you can see with your naked eyes). I have been on this program for approximately 20days?
I can already see the small difference of my body shape but i shall sum in up at the end of my program and show some before and after pictures.
I do not think i wana show it now as there will definitely be more differences in the next 2 months, i will show my progress along the way though and reveal the program to you at the end of the program.  You be the judge and see if it is effective ok?

Will talk more about that program. Those that are keen to know can pm me at valenciafaithz.z@gmail.com.

Of course, i feel better of myself now because a good  change (to the body) is always a pleasant sight to the eyes of many, but most importantly, my eyes love what they see in the mirror. 🙂

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Random photo #OOTD

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IMG_20131002_6Pardon this super random weird pic, i just love it whenever i flex those hard muscles while fixing the hair.
I used to have really flabby arms, so i am darn proud of myself now 😛

Anw, my past week was busy planning for …Project L, and i managed to catch up with Alan and Zen (my fav maid. haha) over the Friday. It was also Felyncia’s Birthday, though we were never close, but i wish her a very good birthday and may she find her own happiness soon! 🙂

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We were chilling at some pub and  then went over to 1 of the thai joints. Not a fan of the place, but the company was good, my ex colls were there, catch up with them abit, and guess who i met? Shihui! 🙂

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It’s been so long, am i glad to see her again and she still look so beautiful. Thank God she still treat me as a friend as there was some misunderstandings in the past between us. Though we can never go back to those days but thank God we are still well. 🙂

I haven been hanging out for so long and i totally let loose that night and went home feeling a tad drunk. Went to bed at 5ish and woke up at 9 the next day. Made breakfast for myself and felt lik crap. Hangover is bad, but Hangover after so many years, is worse. I was like a walking zombie.

But thank goodness i had enough training back in those days when i was marketing for Lifebrandz, i managed to reach home safely. 😛 Ok, i have to include the fact  that i was marketing in that ex co because alot of crazy people actually think i was working as some hostess if i say my prev job needs to drink like a fish. Just a tiny clarification, thanks!

So Saturday, Aunt treated us to dinner and yah, the dinner was really good. In fact, if you ask me to choose spending $ at some restaurant or this place, i will not hesitate to recommend this eating place. It is located at Aljunied, in fact, it is very near to Aljunied MRT station, just beside it.
Every item from the menu is good and it only cost us $160+ for 6 pax. We ordered alot of food that day.
1) Marmite chicken
2) Braised Fish Steamboat
3) Kang Kong (Veg)
4) Xiao Bai Cai (Veg)
5) Salted Egg Prawns
6) Yam Ring

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The affordable prices of the food does not compromise with the quality and it is definitely worth it. However, the downside of the place would be the waiting time. It takes a longer time as it is always crowded, and the waiting time for food is rather long too. But that is small problem, i rather wait for good food than eating crappy food at some expensive restaurants.

Yeap. Address of the place is : 76 Lorong 25A Geylang

Anw, like i was saying, i was working out like a mad woman yesterday and i slept like a baby last night. Wanted to continue as a baby but of course, i cant, and i am here, dozing off.

Alright, i am really zonking out and i gtg, till the next post people! God Bless

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Vdates Mini End Sept

IMG_20130924_200507Hihi! It’s been long as always. 😛

Nothing much but still as busy as ever.

Took the step to step out and everything STILL seems surreal, i reckon it will feel as surreal till the day really comes.

Anyway, i will update on that.

Recently, i read an article and thought it might be of good help to alot of gals/women who are hopelessly in love.

The beginning of the article sounds extremely familiar and i wud definitely write something like that. Totally relates to me.

Well, if you are lost and not sure if you are dating right, please have a read and save yourself.

“When I was in my early twenties, if a guy acted aloof, called back only sometimes and showed minimal interest, I would get hooked. You could say I was addicted to the bad boy/ unavailable boy/ player. I was drawn to what psychotherapist, Ken Page terms as “attractions of deprivation” – when we are drawn to people who embody the worst emotional characteristics of our parents. Basically, the theory explains that we are attracted to people who can wound us the same way we were wounded in our childhood, as our psyche tries to recreate the past void and save us by changing its ending.

“The child in us believes that if the original perpetrators — or their current replacements — finally change their minds, apologize, or make up for that terrible rupture of trust, we can escape from our prison of unworthiness. Our conscious self is drawn to the positive qualities we yearn for, but our unconscious draws us to the qualities which hurt us the most as children.”  – Psychology Today

So games used to work on me because 1) I had unresolved daddy issues and 2) At the tender age of 20, I was trying to figure out who I was and to top it off, I was ridden with insecurity and a low sense of self-worth.

But somewhere in between the passing of a decade, something changed.

I learned to love myself.  I became independent, confident, and started to value my self-worth. I went through hardships and heartbreaks and picked myself back up which built my strength and courage. Instead of relying on beauty as my source of empowerment, I focused on basing my empowerment on my intelligence, successes, values, contributions to the world and how I helped others. In a sense, I finally grew up. I went from being a girl to becoming a woman. And as a woman, you are attracted to very different things than you are as a girl.

A girl is attracted to boys. A woman is attracted to men. Now, this has nothing to do with the actual age of a person. I’m referring to maturity, life vision and stage of life. In fact, some people regardless of their age, will never really grow up. You can switch the genders in this post and most points would likely still apply. Or, read this post on “The 11 Differences Between Dating a Girl vs a Woman“.

If you are a girl (lack independence, are ruled by insecurity, lack self-respect, throw tantrums, have princess syndrome, don’t have strong values or boundaries and can’t hold yourself on your own) then expect that you will attract only boys. However, if you are a woman (independent, ambitious, knows your worth and value, has a strong moral compass, is considerate and an able communicator and doesn’t let insecurity dominate your psyche), then you should be dating a man. And if you can’t spot the difference just yet, here are some pointers.

  1. A man knows what he wants, and goes for it. A boy may have somewhat of an idea, but not really. He doesn’t think too much about it, and even if he does, doesn’t exert much effort to get it. A boy is passive, a man is assertive.
  2. A man plans for his future and is working towards building a foundation and infrastructure in order to have a family (at some point in his life).  A boy lives only in the moment and his plans are mostly around which bar he’s going to hit up on the weekend.
  3. A man looks for a woman with intelligence, who is supportive, grounded and encompasses a shared set of values when choosing a partner. A boy cares mostly only for girls who are hot, wild and exciting.
  4. A man knows a good woman when he meets one and will take initiative to get to know her. A boy may make an attempt if you’re lucky, but gives up before ever really trying.
  5. A man has the courage to have uncomfortable conversations. He is honest with his intentions and lets people know where they stand. A boy avoids. He ignores confrontation or any serious talks about feelings. Instead of dealing with a situation, he runs away from it or creates drama or excuses to mask the fact he’s not that into you or a relationship.
  6. A man knows when to invest in a woman and jump in with two feet. A boy is always “testing” – he doesn’t fully commit because he never knows if he is quite ready. But the truth is, because he is a boy, regardless of who he meets, he will never be ready due to the stage of life he is in.
  7. A man knows how to have a good time and be social, but is often busy making strides in his career and building his life. A boy is getting crunk with his buddies at the bar every weekend.
  8. A man takes the time to reflect on the type of man he wants to be, the example he wants to leave and the vision for his life. He has put thought into his values. A boy has not established his moral compass or values and consequently, is often inconsistent.
  9. A man has integrity. He means what he says, and says what he means. He has follow through and actions his promises. And if he can’t he has the guts to tell you why. A boy makes promises but doesn’t follow through.
  10. A man is afraid of rejection but will put himself out there anyway. A boy is afraid of rejection and acts passive so that his pride and ego won’t ever get too banged up.

Now, a lot of these differences require taking the time to know someone to figure out if the apple of your eye is indeed a man, or a mere boy. However, one of the quickest filters that you can notice from the beginning is this:

11. A boy plays games. A man doesn’t.

*To clarify, when I’m referring to “games” I mean mind games.”

The above article in italics does not belong to me. I am just sharing. 
Credits: http://justmytype.ca/11-differences-between-dating-a-boy-vs-a-man/

As For Me….

IMG_20130922_194827Yup, i absolutely agree and i have far too many goals to attain now. I have been with the right ones but regretably they have to leave and i have to leave. And the wrong ones, thanks but no thanks, i had enough of bullshits. Special thanks to that last ex who beat the hell outta me to let me grow up and grow out of being silly enough to stick to an abusive man who slps around. 
I am never so thankful for being alone now. 

But who knows which nice angel will appear next right? But till then, no bullshit, drama free, focus on food. LOL. kidding, focus on the more important stuff.

Meanwhile, some Throwback pictures, went to Slug again with gf and love love love the brunch and chilling session as always. I love Garden Slug, i love the boss of Slug, he is very nice and considerate and is constantly checking how we feel about the food. If there is anything we are unhappy about, he would change another plate for us or offer some other nice gestures which i do not want to say much. (just in case there are rotten apples who wana take advantage of him!)
LOL. But generally, he is a nice chap that really take care of his customer. It is also a place for the PLUs and Garden slug welcome animals 🙂

It is a nice chilling place and personally, i love the food. No special recommendation because so far, i love al the food i order and i am trying to get gf to go back again tis week, Hopefully.

Garden Slug
8688 8575
55 Lorong L Telok Kurau #01-59/61 Bright CentreSingapore, Singapore 425500

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IMG_20130921_190931Chilled with babies.
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Meanwhile, as i am on  diet, i am eating ALL THESE!
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Love this, Nutella Banana Mash. Sinful to the max and guess what, we added BANANAS and Nutella!

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#Garden Slug

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And then, a large bowl of not very fantastic Ramen, perhaps i had better ones before.
Since it is not fantastic, shant share the address and the shop’s name.

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Thanks Gf for the above!

There are plenty of Mooncakes at home now, from various friends and i have no particular interest in them. Lucky me.
but for the snowskin (s), i am guilty… :p

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Basically, alot of food lah. I was eating like crazy. Actually, not really crazy crazy but i wasnt starving.
How is that consider a diet plan?

Well, i am on a program right now and all i have to do is eat moderately.
I wasnt exactly gorging, but i am def not starving.

 

I just started this plan a week ago, if the result is good, i will definitely share.

Oh and yes, i still exercise, not that frequent but i am still trying my best to do it at least once or twice a week, one and 1/2 hour each time.

IMG_20130920_204757Amazing view during workout. 🙂

IMG_20130920_235727Zen joinned me for the workout and was screaming tired after 5 minutes of cycling. Lousy. LOL

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And i spent 1 of the Sundays packing my desk. It was WAR zone.

IMG_20130915_165721And i found an old picture of me and my buddy. It was year 2007, i was skinny and dark. 
And to those who keep saying i m resting my boobs on his arms, please get a life, it was just the angle.
Y would i do that? He wasnt a bf to begin with and it is quite obscene to hear that.

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IMG_20130915_164925Trust me, it might not look very neat in these pictures, but the desk was really neat and so much neater than before. 
4 hours of packing paid off.

And

My random pictures which you might have seen in my Insta if you are following me.
Follow me if you are not!
http://instagram.com/valliezlesley

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IMG_20130922_233300Especially true currently.

IMG_20130924_161614Oh, to that new follower on my Insta, hi and thanks! 🙂
U have always been in my memory and thanks for the wonderful memories you gave.

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And I just did a test that is extremely accurate, you might wana try?

Click TEST to try out now!

Alright, i gtg, till the next post!

Vdates – it’s been a while

IMG_20130904_2Hi everyone! Thank you for STILL visiting this space even though the updates are lesser and shorter.

Anyway, i am not really well, as mentioned previously and i am really busy planning some stuff. Thus i really feel sorry for not updating.
But initially when i started this blog, i wanted to write as and when i want to and not feeling obliged to.

I hate restrictions and i like to do things at my pace. Not a good thing because it reflects ill discipline, i noe. But honestly, blogging is not really part of the important aspects of my life as of now.

Alot happened and emotionally and physically, i am not able to handle my life for the past month. But all is good, nothing is too dramatic unless i allow it (which regrettably, i did in a few events)

So, i went to see the doc with Mum on 16th. Got my meds but not feeling much difference though. But i am glad i took the first step to improve things. Hopefully my condition can be more stable so that i wont hurt myself and most importantly, the people around me.

It was a fruitful day that day because we managed to do what we wanted and needed to on the  ToDoList.

I am really excited to introduce some new events in my life that are happening soon and i hope you will be as excited as i am too. Hurhur.

Of course, when 1 gains, 1 loses. I ‘lost’ 2 friends whom i was once closed with in the past month. I used to write a whole chunk of reasons why, just to defend myself in the past. Not anymore.

All i can say is, my conscience is clear, i do not need to pacify friends with kids behavior, i do not need to be interrogated, I do not need to please a Malebitch who is interested in my personal thoughts and wana gossip out of it.
I would also wana add that, i am indeed upset initially but after seeing the picture clearly, i dont give a shit to why would the wife of this friend arrange for friends gathering just the next day after we argue. The gathering excludes me, of course. you wana be scheming? Beware of Karma, thats Buddha’s teaching.

Another friend who seem so kind and full of Gospel preaching is now no longer someone i can trust nor believe. All i can say is, i understand that boyfriends are important, i have my moments of neglecting friends for boyfriends. But this time round, i see how a ‘preacher’ fails in actions, and she is supposed to be my spiritual buddy, my good friend and my insurance agent. But in short, during the time i need her the most, whether if it is during my sickness or whether it is related to the insurance issues, SHE WAS NEVER THERE.

So fuck off with hypocrisy and the fake whatsapp concern msges. Just Get out totally from my life.

I wana quit drama so pardon the french, FO. And to those that think i am the problem, perhaps i am really the problem. So it makes it better for them to lose me and vice versa. Hope that makes u happy.

Ok anyway, thank God my gf is still with me. we had our first fight during the time i went crazy a mth ago. But really, we are still as close or closer. Love her.

As i mentioned, alot has happened and i really do not think i wana pen them down 1 by 1. So generally, i am trying my best to summarize.

Sister has moved out to try out being independent and to take a break. Initially, we were very reluctant to let her do that but i guess everyone has to go through certain phases in life. I just pray that she is safe out there.

This Mid Autumn Festival, we will still meet to eat mooncakes for no1 can resist durian snowskin from Peony Jade, not forgetting the Dark Choc Cognac snowskin from Raffles Hotel. LOL. Yes, i bought them all without hesitation, i am a sucker for snowskins. 😛

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IMG_20130909_1Best Meal at the Most affordable price ever during the recent short trip.

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IMG_20130905_2I feel so sorry for being sucha brat to my aunt recently. I guess i really have alot to improve on. My temper especially. 😦

IMG_20130907_7Love this picture of my sis and i, discovered it in my Aunt’s Hp. Grabbed it! 😛

So anw, recently the family gathered to celebrate Aunt’s Bday and it was a happy celebration. The bill for the dinner was like $400+ for 6 of us. FOL. haha. It was really worth it because the food was really decent compared to the last place we went (i cant emphasize enough how bad it was, please read HERE)

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We went to Rama Thai Restaurant, it is a small restuarant that is seated along the street of wedding shops at Tanjong Pagar. Previously,i ate at this place with my colleagues and boss and we thought they serve pretty good Thai- Teochew food.
Thus i went back the second time with my family to try out more dishes. Do not be alarmed by the amount i mentioned previously, it was $400+ because i was greedy. I added alot more dishes on top of our set meals.
If you have a lesser budget but intend to have really good food, you may opt for the $28++/pax or $38++/pax set meals. Honestly, the quantity is alot and the quality is definitely worth every cent.

And yes, the set meals promotional price is available on weekends too, you might have to check if they open on Sunday though. I did not ask and even if i did, i prolly forgot. Here is  their Website: http://www.ramathai.com.sg/

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Was really happy that all are present this time round, for a birthday gathering. All of us were very happy, especially aunt 🙂 Well, it felt like CNY reunion and frankly, this has never really happen ever since God knows how many decades.

Even Uncle went! He paid the full sum and i felt bad because i was the 1 that wanted to celebrate for my Aunt, thus i sneakily hide half of the total amount in his room. LOL

We went back to Granny’s to cut cake and went home to crush after that, everyone was exhausted.

Btw, Happy Birthday Aunt, You are precious!

So, yah, i kinda jumbled up all the activities and stuff in this post. But yah. I am sorry. Haha. Rushing for time as i have other stuff to take care of.
Hope you dont mind the tiny bits of me being frank and loud, i cant and i dont want to contain inside me.

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But still, may God bless all! Till next update!

Acceptance.

Approximately 15 minutes ago, i was very depressed.

I was asking for a favour from my sister and although it is not unexpected that she turned me down, i still feel pricked because probably i still have hope in me (that perhaps she will show some care by saying Yes)

However,  she turned me down flatly and even say things like “you said you can do it alone”

Sure, of course i can do it alone.

I am doing it alone, arent i doing it alone from day 1?

I know that nobody is obliged to help me out. It is a dream that both of us wanted and since the day she backed out, i am still in this dream.
It is fine, i wanted it.

But despite the fact that she isnt in this with me, i still think alot of how to share this dream with her, should this dream harvest into something fruitful.

But i guess, that is just one sided.

I guess what i do not understand is not about why she reject my plead for help.

I do not understand why as blood tied kins, how can someone so close (that came out from the same tummy) is able to feel indifferent when it comes to rejecting a favour asked. She feels nothing, AT ALL.

She just threw me a sentence “i dont feel like”

Now, that is very hurting.

I would offer my help with all i can even if she says that she is able to do it alone. Is that very stupid or Kay-Poh of me? Should i mind my own business in future?
If i do, i will feel uneasy and selfish, perhaps that is my character. I cannot bring myself to say things like “well u wanted to do it alone, so you do it alone, why are u complaining?”

Because i will feel for the other party, i will know how stressful she is, i will try my best to help even if she does not ask anything from me. I cant bear to see her feeling stressed all alone….

So why cant she do the same for me???

20minutes later, which is now…

I feel much better.

I guess i have only Jesus to thank.

I thought of Him. 

If you have to know, i can share with you.

Look, my belief and faith towards Jesus is strong but my love for Him isnt strong enough……Why would i say that?

Well, I am sure HE is there for me every second and is waiting for me to turn to him and give HIM some attention. But honestly, i didnt.
Most of the time, if i am not busy working and planning out my dream, i am watching some TV drama series.
I only talk briefly to HIM for 5minutes before i sleep and less than a minute when i wake up.
I am sure HE feels as sad as how i feel now….

But if HE were to feel hurt and expect me to be as patient as HIM, HE would have given up on me long ago because i can never be as faithful, i can never give HIM my constant attention.

But HE loves me still. That is unconditional love.  That is Acceptance.

Thus, as i am typing this, i can feel my heart lighten up, feeling much better. This is the 1st time i try thinking of Jesus when i m very depressed and helpless, i am ashamed to even say that this is the 1st time but indeed it is.
In the past, i just allow myself to be sad and wallow in self pity and sadness but this time round, i have too much on my plate to handle, i cant afford to waste time in sadness and insecurity.

I cant be anymore thankful, thank you Jesus, thank you for making me understand that every1 has her flaws, and i have my flaws too.
Most importantly, i cannot and should not expect anyone to be as “helpful” as me, there are things that i cant do too and if anyone expects that i do the same thing and behave the same way as them, i would be unhappy too.

Maybe this lesson is for me to learn – everyone has different character and personality, she might be less helpful but perhaps she is more calm when it comes to arguments. I shouldnt expect of her to be the same as me like how she wouldnt expect me to be the same of her. Maybe i should let go and stop expecting. Somethings can’t be forced but some relationships are destined, we cant change that. Thus we should really learn to Accept.

Thank you God.

Now, you might find that this is silly, but i really did manage to feel better and now i am off to do more constructive things, to plan for my project.

I am not trying to help anyone here but i just need an avenue to pen down my thoughts. I haven been opening up ever since i was told  that i am ill and that i need a shrink…

I might find strength in my Faith, but if you are not a believer and you think that Jesus is like Santa Claus, perhaps you can also see things in another perspective…
There will always be someone that is nicer to you than you know, he or she will accept you unconditionally, it might be your Mum/Dad, your Spouse or Partner? I wouldnt know, but you know, because he/she is the 1st person that came to your mind when i mention this.

However, this person has never once expect the same from you, he/she forgives and loves you even though you are not as nice as them. This world is never fair, quoting my sister “if the world is fair, all fingers will be of the same length”.
While you are upset with others failing your expectations of them, there are people who are equally upset with you but still accepting you… Maybe you would like to do the same, by accepting another person who sin differently as you?

I am just saying. Like i say, i am not even sure if i can help myself because of my illness, i am not so noble to help the world. I just wish to pen down my thoughts and share if i can.

Till the next post, may Love take over all. God Bless`

I will be back!

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Hi everybody. I know it has been a long long time since my last update.

Sorry that i havent been doing it dutifully.

However, i thought i ought to settle some personal matters, like my illness and some other stuff before i come back.

Rest assured that this place will never dies.

I will be back with aplenty updates and probably, it will benefit you aplenty too!

Stay tuned and brace yourselves for surprises!

Will be leaving town tonight and may i bring back surprises!

🙂

Vdates Aug (1)

IMG_20130807_1Heylo!

I recently went to get my fringe trimmed. Boring me has officially return to having “bangs” again. Yeap. Boring.

I wanted so much to persist on having long and flowy fringe like my GF but i couldnt take it no more. The fringe is getting on my nerves by getting into my eye all the time.

It was kinda random because i just walked into a Shunji Matsuo after my workout at the Gym and requested for Bangs. I hope i look better now. GF said that i look like a kid but really, i wish i do. But ney, i dont  think so.

HAHAAH.

All along, fringe always has the higher votes, but who cares right, i gotta like what i see in the mirror and not accommodating to what others like. I used to keep my fringe long just because my ex bfs prefer that to “bangs”. All the while in the past, i was pleasing others. But honestly, if a person is gona love me any lesser just because of my hair, then he can go love others. I dont need such love. But of  course, i dont mean anyone must love my dirty hair if i never wash for weeks la.

HAHA!

Ok anyway, i love this bangs now. No matter who say what.

🙂

IMG_20130804_5the before and after!

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IMG_20130805_10

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Nothing much over the past 2 weeks. The usual, i hit the gym, stay home for movie marathon (alone and with Mummy), hang out with gf, played with babies, went church.

Frankly, i still go to church despite whatever is happening and despite the uneasiness in me. Thus i was hoping that the msg i receive can be pure. Last week’s msg was good and i did alot of reflection on myself as well. But honestly, it will be better if there wasnt so much hidden implications. I mean, it is a personal feeling, sorry if i wronged anyone but i love Dr Robi. I just wish that at certain point of time, there wasnt so much awkward hints of personal attacks without mentioning of names. I wish there wasnt so much clapping and cheering for the wrong reason.

Watched so much movies that i really cant remember how many. Haha! But i think the 1 that left a deep impression on me was Unfaithful.

I used to avoid watching some shows and betrayals/ adultery-related is def 1 of them. I guess it was due to an old scar in me. But well, everyone has to recover somehow or rather and so i did. The show was a long one, by Richard Gere and the beautiful Diane Lane. It is so rich with emotions and very realistic. But somehow, i can relate to how the characters feel in the show. Still, i was cursing the wife because she hurt the husband so deeply while indulging in her sexual desires.

Oh well…

IMG_20130810_223516 IMG_20130810_224552

Anyway, i took some pictures while trying some clothes. Guess which 1s did i buy?

I love them all though.

Like usual, i did not edit nor photoshop the pictures. I did filtered them though. I would also want to keep a record of how the body looks as time passes while i continue with my exercises.

The fact is that nothing much is shed, i am still not a Size 0. Oh please, i am not even a size 4. I am a size 8 to 10 and very occasionally 6 for certain brands.
But really, i am feeling better of myself now than 6mths ago because although not solid fit as in FIT, i am not as flabby as before. Especially my arms, and i believe my legs are slowly but surely becoming tougher.
It feels better no matter what i am decking on my body now, at least i know it is not on a pile of soft flabs. HAHA!

Some commented the clothes i wore above look disastrous on me, while my collgeaue just told me 1 min ago that she feels i have been exercising wrongly because she feels i still look ‘fat’ wor.

Ok, to say i am not offended by either is  gona be so  fake, i am affected but trust me, it is only to a certain extent.
In the past, i would be so affected till i feel inferior of myself, till i doubt myself, till i feel so scared whenever i head out. I would feel terrible and i would ask myself why are people looking at me.

Not anymore.

Really, i dont want to swear but trust me. Things are different now.

Look, my colleague is alot bigger than me and sometimes i really doubt her agenda of saying mean things to me. Of course, i am giving her the benefit of doubt too. She might really want the best for me but i dont think i should listen to someone that eats and eats and goes on diet pills. She doesnt exercise at all, and thus why should i be listening to her?

It doesnt help when i caught her staring at my new clothes. my body and my hair. It is super creepy because i caught her doing that while my back was facing her. Why would i know – you asked. I have a mirror infront of me and her expressions was reflected – crystal clear. Scary much.

Honestly, i am not a confident person which many thought i am. I have been through alot of things and along the experiences i have, i build myself up slowly and i am still not 100% as confident as you might think i am. But i am thankful i started somewhere, since i dont know where.

If you are a inferior person, I hope you can too, Look, you gotta start somewhere and you gotta do something about it. I am tired of wallowing in self pity and self blame. Arent you?

I know it is tough but slowly, surely. Remember that nobody is confident from birth. Sometimes i confuse myself too. Sometimes i mix up humility with inferiority. It is tough for me as i always thought that being humble is good but sometimes i tend to be too humble for my own good and it turns into ugly inferiority. It is really hard, and i m still figuring which is which. Dont ask me why because i do not know how to explain, it is just me.

But really, trust me, not everyone views you as how badly you view yourself. If you know you are doing the right thing and you know the right thing you do can produce right result, What does it matter if who say what?

For eg. my colleague. She is always saying i am fat when she is so much bigger than me, when she just eats and does not exercise. I and probably the whole world knows  that, exercising will be a long term beneficial plan than diet pills and supplements. I and probably  the whole world knows that i will look more freshened up, my muscles will look so much nicer and i will look toner than before.
Does what she says actually matters?

IMG_20130811_005455You prolly seen this in my insta. I shall repost for those that havent.

It really doesnt matter what others say.
Because not everyone is gona like what u say what u do what u talk abt what u wear what u watch whatever.
Some might just be jealous, some are just opinionated and the others are jus genuinely not liking you.
What matters is, do u like yourself?
Do u like what u say/do/watch/wear or eat? If u do, that settles it.
If u trust ur own judgment and preference, that settles it.
Nobody feels gd abt u if u cant even feel good about urself.
Check that mirror and see wonderful image and let those critics go on, they cant see a bigger picture.
#confidence

.

This is just an example i would want to share with you. Sorry if my example isnt great enough but really, because i go through criticism like you do, and this is so real and instant (happened about 1 min ago), i just have to quote this example.

Alot of others doubt me too, saying i am not spiritual enough. But really, i do not have to account to anyone about my spiritual being, i know it is enough as long as i account myself to God. Some others quote bible verses and some others preach alot but i really dont see them walk the talk anyways. So, what you see might not be what is real anyway.

What i am trying to say here is, as long as you have a clear conscience of what is right, and you are not guilty of doing the wrong thing, who cares abt what they say?

Beauty is subjective, you can be Jessica Alba and there will still be people saying you are ugly. Thus lets not even touch on that. Everyone is beautiful in their own way. Confidence is Beauty but Arrogance is not, neither is Inferiority. I am very much aware of this thus i am reminding myself constantly.

I hope you too, keep that in mind.

It is definitely not easy for me to type these out because now and then i struggle with insecurity. It was just weeks ago that i cried out to Mel about my chest problem (i will leave it private and talk more about it next time)
It was just days ago i keep feeling bloated and fat.

But it is also God’s way of showing me that, hey, Jennifer Lawrence is so gorgeous and her body is so hot despite not being a size 0 or 6. She isnt your typical bombshell nor Kate Moss but boy, her body is so hot. (and she is weighing above 60kg fyi)
Yeap, i watched the Silver Linings Playbook over the long weekend. Haha.

Jennifer-Lawrence-e1355349012587Credits of images: healthyceleb.com

Jennifer-lawrence-bra-size
It is also God’s way of showing me that alot of people only talk the talk and not walk the talk when situations arise. That certain person who preaches alot is now missing in action.
I shant judge but yeap, alot of times it is like that.

Not many might know about your struggles and your credits for doing well, but you know, God knows. Sometimes it is enough.

Before i end this post, here is wishing everyone that God show u (including me pls) how much potential you have, and how beautiful you are and for those tt are too arrogant, may God shows you defeat so you practice humility.

images

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images (2)In my opinion, Leslie Cheung has to be the most beautiful Man in Asia besides Takaeshi Kaneshiro.
Given the fact that Leslie Cheung is all natural, he wins Kaneshiro of course! (the latter had plastic)
But even Leslie himself was being insulted as ‘ugly Gay’. *Roll eyes- since when sexual preference has to do with looks right
Ryan Gosling, almost the next perfect thing in Hollywood, was just criticized by my friend this morning of being ugly. I mean, who the crap will say that?!

Now i really hope you see the picture, nobody will earn the liking of everyone. Not even Ryan Gosling nor Leslie Cheung.

I wish i can write more but i gotta go, i promise more for next time round! 🙂 Meanwhile be blessed and browse my random pictures. :p

IMG_20130809_233128Supposed to be a drinking session but it turned out to be durian + Red wine session over at Zen’s crib over the long weekend.

IMG_20130809_151701Pigeons around my house, lazy to even move when i am near.

IMG_20130808_215508Woo! Mum and my treats for the PH eve.
The Pink 1 was really very attractive, even more attractive after you open the packaging.
Taste good too! 

IMG_20130807_224924My 1 way ticket to failure of diet plan with my gf. 

IMG_20130809_014543The show i didnt manage to even start, gona watch it this coming weekend!
Gerard Butler~

IMG_20130810_225042Indeed and i am facing this dilemma non stop. 
I guess i will figure it out.

A song i long forgotten if not for the movie. My fav~

Stevie Wonder – Don’t you worry bout a thing

Vshares – Asian Skin Solutions

Followed by the last post of me introducing Vshares, i would like to share about my very official First Vshare.

To make things easier, i will categorize the service/products and i will give verdicts and my own opinions as below. Of course, there are always ways to improve, do let me know if you have any feedbacks or ways to improve Vshares! Your comment is very much appreciated.

Ok, let’s start.

As this is the first Vshare, let me just explain and elaborate a little,

  • Category is product/services’ category.
    In this case, Skincare as it is.
  • Value for money is how affordable it is comparing to market price, you see 4 Vs and that is on the scale of 5Vs.
    1 V means it is extremely expensive and 5Vs means it is very affordable  comparing to market rate.
    Thus here, i am suggesting that it is rather affordable.
  • Level of Service is to tell you how satisfied i am with the service. Please bear in mind  that i am Not fussy but i am rather particular with services.
    In this case, i gave 2 Vs out of 5Vs. Which also means that the service basically fail because it is like 2 stars out of 5.
  • Likes means how much i enjoy/like the service or product in overall.
    In this case, it is a major flop.
  • Will i recommend to my friend: No
    Needless to explain.

Category: SkinCare

Value for $: VVVV

Level of service: VV

Likes: V

Will i recommend to my friend: No

Vshares:

Went for a facial session with my Mum and Sis last Friday. We do not usually do facials and this  time round, it is purely for fun and it is some Deals vouchers. (i cant remember which deals company though, groupon/big deals or deals)
Personally, i never like buying vouchers off deals companies, especially when it comes to services that requires me to make quick decision and commit to packages.

I was from the beauty industry sometime back and i know perfectly how and why these vouchers are sold cheaply, to lure potential new customers in.
In the past, i used to pressurize the sales consultants to do whatever they can to sell and secure the customers.
Of course, hard selling is not encouraged but that is really not what i can control. For my part, i just want sales.
But if there r any complaints of hard-selling, i had to rectify as well, it is just…difficult.

Thus…i quit! hahaha. Ok, honestly, that is not the reason why i quitted.

Anyway, we all know the rationale behind such deals vouchers/cheap vouchers, lure u to the shop, attack you with hard selling and make you commit. That is how it usually works. (not so for the F&B sector as you do not have to sign on anything with them. Usually, it is the hair or skincare industry  that kinda ‘force’ you to make impulsive decisions)

You might be asking now, why do we still go for it since it is clear that we are gonna be attacked by some hard selling craps. Well, we are very sure it is a one time off thing, it is agreed between the 3 of us. It is purely for fun and just another get together bonding time for us.
However, it will be exceptional if we really fall in love with the services and all but very unlikely.

So we entered the shop…and i just realized that i forgot to mention the name! Haha, ok, we went to Asian Skin Solutions at Parkmall.
We were 10 mins late and we understood that we might have to let others have our slots since we were late.

The recept were China ladies, they were friendly and polite. They were polite even though we are not their regular customers. That is a plus point.

As usual, we filled up some forms, and were asked if we want drinks.It was 7.15pm then.

Half an hour passed and it was already 7.45pm. I was abit frustrated because we were late for 10mins but we have to wait endlessly till God knows what time. Nobody say anything to us after asking us if we want drinks half an hr ago. We were told to wait but they said have no idea how long we are gonna wait. This is rather unprofessional.

I started to ask how long more must we wait and i guess my face spells frustrations and they then invited us into the consultation room.
We waited for another 10 mins before a sales consultant/ beautician came to check our skin for us using their machine.
She shared with us on our skin problems and how we can improve our skin. Meanwhile, she fumbled with the machine as the machine couldnt work.

She asked me why it doesnt work. Yes, you heard me right, she asked me why Her machine doesnt work. I just smiled weakly, maybe she is joking, i thought.

Sorry, really sorry when i say this but i felt i really need to include this. The beautician that came and check our skin for us, her skin was really bad. My skin is def better, but even my Mum and Sis have better skin than her. Imagine. I do not want to be mean, but i really feel that if you cant even take care of your own skin, how can i ever trust u (to take care of mine)?
Yes, for eg. a Personal Trainer doesnt necessary has to be super Fit to be able to train you but frankly, how to trust someone fat that cant even take care of himself/herself to take care of you?

AsianSKin6Image Credits: http://www.deal.com.sg

We each went into the room and we really did not expect fantastic services because we bought cheap deals vouchers, we know where we stand. Haha. But well, i have to admit that the service is not too bad in the room, is almost the same as what you will get in every decent beauty parlous, the usual.

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Then we started with our treatment respectively. It is relatively fast as i can feel there is abit of rush  there.
However, we ended the sessions at 10pm. Sigh, we were hungry and tired and we havent had our dinner.

We wanted to rush off to eat because all of us were famished. However, the sales consultant/beautician actually said: aiya, we also havent eat leh!

I was like..who cares? If you wana eat, then dont hard sell lor. But my Mum was kind enough to say: aiyo, why you work till now and never eat. please go eat, we shant hold back your time.

The lady replied: thats why, i am telling you the discounts and all you can get for signing package today, i am not expecting you to sign like $2000 or $1000. It is only $888. You know that numbers is very important to us, we only want you to commit so you wont go elsewhere, no matter how much you sign, it is ok, we just need you to be with us.

The whole convo was very long and it went on for another 1/2 hr despite the fact that me and sis kept saying no, despite the fact that my mum was SO PATIENT and keep telling the lady that we do not want to commit to any packages. We just want to go off for dinner and we will consider coming back if we want.

The lady was super impatient and said: do you think u will come back? I am telling you to sign the package. I am even willing to offer you $388 for 10 sessions, which means per session is $38. You are aware that you cant get this price elsewhere right? It is only $38 per session and you are unwilling to pay, how would you come back next time? Because next time you are back, the package offer will not be $388 anymore, it will be $180 per session. Moreover, from $1700+, i have reduced to $388 for you at student price. I am not supposed to do that you know.

She continued: who in this world will pay $180 for 1 time of facial? Would you?

I: then why do you want to charge so high?

She: so to encourage more sign ups for packages. now that you know we can go as low as $38, you wouldnt pay $180 the next time round. You will not be back anymore.

This whole frustrating thing went on for so long till i was very  giddy. Mum was polite throughout and she really was behaving like a  lady to reject politely again and again.

Actually, i really understand that these people have targets to meet, but despite being aggressive, one has to really consider the well being of the customer. We have not had our dinner and i thought it was rude to hold us back. We did apologized for holding them back because we are not their potential customers that they were expecting.
But by telling me that they charge others $1700+ while giving us the $388 deal does not help because it is rather unethical. Sorry, i know that it is supposed to be some “secret”  but i can’t hold back. It is not fair to anyone that goes there.
But again, who knows how many people heard this “secret” before.

Also, aggressive selling is good, but not at the expense of offending customers. The lady who said things like “i also havent eat” and “i want database, i want numbers but yet you guys are still hesitating” is really not cut out to be a sales person.

Overall, the experience at Asian Skin Solutions is unpleasant because there is no professionalism. I have worked in a bigger beauty company before, yes i admit there are bound to be aggressive sales persons and that makes everyone afraid to go to any beauty parlous. However, i have witnessed some of my ex colleagues to be very professional. They would be pushy but yet they know the limit.

To be fair, the manager of the lady was rather ok. She was thanking us all the way despite hard selling and she was patient. She understood that we are not obliged to sign anything with them and thus she do not mind selling even though she has not had dinner as well.

Having said that, i will not return because the whole facial and so called “Repaired Collagen” treatment did not impress me. I can do all those stuff at home myself. The after effect was normal and to be fair, 1 time of treatment cant really determine much. No doubt, the face looks lighter instantly but that is just NORMAL. Any facial will give you the instant radiance, that is just expected.

IMG_20130805_7No filter, under warm lighting after the treatment.

The “Repaired Collagen” treatment worth $380 per session, which they claimed to have given me despite the fact that my voucher only entitle me 2 times of facial (U.P $360).

If $380 for a single time treatment is only so-so, i’d rather continue putting my Hada Labo 3 in 1 perfect gel then.

So, nope, i am not going back because the hard selling scares the hell outta me, and the treatment is really nothing worth raving about.

p/s it is not that i cant afford that $388 like what the beautician was suggesting and harping about, i just see no value in the product and services.

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