I am back to blog about some updates.
Feeling very sleepy and lethargic now and i just wish to get this done and over with.
As usual, i know myself, if i drag this post any further, this post will never be up.
The past weeks were not very good for me, Mum was in the hospital and both Sis and i were so tired rushing to hosp daily after work and we slept late everyday.
I think we still owe sleep debts and the weekends were really not enough.
Used to think that “having no time” is an excuse. Not till i finally realise that i literally have no time.
However, i managed to take some time off lunch to cycle in the gym, even if it is only 30 to 40 mins each time.
I used to hate exercising. SUPER HATE and MAJOR HATE. I know boys in the past who find Sporty girls hot and i was like “nah“. I know of sporty people in the past who never fails to try convincing me that exercising is good and Blah Blah Blah….
But i rejected and denied all Sports related topics.
However, thank God that due to my weight gain, i started to exercise.
Initially, it was really unbearable. It is like doing chores you hate, it is like super frustrating to me.
Before i start, i would like to say that i am not preaching about Health and Exercises because it can be rather boring, but i would like to share how i feel about Exercising . The views you are gona read will be coming from a person who has NEVER exercise since young (please do not include the Physical Education time in school), someone who really hated exercising.
Ok, at the beginning, i just want to shed some fats because i have gained weight though Chips and Chocs – nuff said (HAAA)
Comparing to the time i was really depressed while i was with my ex, i look alot more rounder than then. I was really sad and depressed back then and thus i look skinnier then.
Around a year ago.
Cant exactly find the pictures i took last time, this was during those times which i was not very happy (cant tell from the pic right?)
and i was kinda skinnier than now -_-
Pardon the damn wig.
LOL the picture without mosiac is super MEH!
Thats my Aunt’s place btw, i went to visit her.
I started with running. It was not too bad because each time after running, i feel much better about myself.
Not that i would see immediate effects of slimming, but i feel better because i managed to do something i never thought i would, i managed to run 30mins each time even though i thought i would collapse at the 15th minute.
There is a sense of achievement and is really fulfilling.
I feel the immediate effect of being ‘lightened’ (of course, there will not be differences in the weight THAT FAST and thus it is not the weight i am talking about), i am talking about the muscles and the ‘lightening’ feeling one has after exercising.
It is something like how you would feel after a massage.
That was in April and i was still eating normally, not exactly clean.
In May, i started doing more exercises and i managed to do some squats and stretching and toning. Till date, i am still not very diligent in doing them, which i am guilty of.
However, i started going to the gym.
Almost everyone i know tell me the following points:
1) Exercise does not requires you to waste Money. Signing up with a Gym is waste of Money.
2) Going to Gym does not help you with slimming down.
3) It is a waste of time.
Well, i used to think that way too.
However, i really enjoy the facilities of the gym and i love using the machines. I know that the treadmill doesnt help in slimming but i am fine, i dont really like running on that, i rather run on my own if i wana run.
(i have stopped running for more than a mth thou, however i substitute running with other exercises, more on that later)
And the reason why i decide to sign a package with the gym is because….
1) I do agree that exercising does not requires one to spend $. But i am a noob in sports, i do not know what kind of exercises to do on my own, i do not know where to start without the help of machines and PT (personal trainers).
Yes, i can watch Youtube and learn but honestly, that is a chore to me.
I am not saying that i am rich, i do not know the definition of ‘rich’ as it varies but i am def not in the ‘rich’ category. However, i guess i can still afford that $100+/ mth at the moment.
I want to enjoy my exercise regime and searching for ways on Youtube is definitely not enjoyable for me.
I want proper guidance and someone whom i can ask.
I want a place which i can go to, to do my workout. Thus i decided to spend this amount of money.
It is approximately $150 a month for my package. Which also means that it costs me around $15 per visit IF i visit the gym 10 times a month.
It has been less than a month since i am with the gym, and i think i lost count in the number of times i go. Prolly more than 10? I honestly cant remember. But at $15/ per visit, it is really worth it. (that is if i visit 10 times a month, if i visit more times a month, for eg. 15, it basically means i pay only $10 per visit)
There are also free lessons, which might cost a bomb if you sign up outside (i used to sign up lessons with the Community Centers and yeah, they arent exactly cheap)
2) I was saying how much i hated exercising right? To me, it was never easy to exercise because i was never a sporty person. I was lazy and i still am lazy to a certain extent. Exercising is not exactly enjoyable because i hated to sweat, i hated how i look during exercising (super unglam), i hated the out of breathe feeling.
I did not exactly excel in school for exercising and i used to think i am just not cut out for exercising.
However, during this period of time which i attempted to exercise, i find that i have fallen in love with working out.
It is a very refreshing feeling each time. On days which i am very tired and sleepy, i will usually rest but sometimes i push myself to cycle for at least 30mins and i usually feel super refreshed aft that.
I am not sure why but it is supposed to be good that one feels refreshed after exercising than feeling sick and tired after working out.
I do not know when exactly did i fall in love with exercising but i know i did. On days which i did not workout, i will feel guilty and i will yearn for another session of work out.
Is like…not seeing your bf/gf and you yearn to see them and feel them (and i am talking about the bf/gf that you really love and not the ones you are sick of, haha) Sorry but that is like the nearest description.
Thus i really do not mind if i slim down or not. Of course, it is a bonus to slim down, i would Love to slim down after exercising so much. But if i dont, i will not feel so shortchanged because exercising is like love to me now, i do not lose out either way because i am doing something i love and this thing that i love does not harm my body like “smoking” (i used to love smoking). Instead, i stay healthier because of exercising.
It is a win win situation.
Oh, and yah, i kinda replaced Running with Swimming and Cycling. I cant really swim well but i can swim, i cant cycle (ride a bicycle) but i cycle on the machines in the gym.
I enjoy doing these than running and thus i have not been running.
Honestly, if you ask me, i rather do the workouts i enjoy doing than forcing myself doing something i dread.
Is not that i hate running, but i really love swimming and cycling more.
And for more intensive cardio workouts, i use the step up machines.
I believe that one will continue the workout regime and not quit halfway only if it is enjoyable.
3) as i mentioned, it is a win win situation thus it is not a waste of time. Maybe it is the age. But i really regret taking care of my body only now because no $ can buy health. Even though i am not sick and all now, but it is good to take care of our bodies earlier as prevention is better than cure.
As alot of you already knew, i have a very irritating colleague who diss me daily because i exercise. She would say the following:
1) Gym and trainning with a PT is a waste of $. My friend did that for 3 mths and he did not slim down at all.
2) You are eating clean everyday but you are still not seeing results, so what are you planning to do in the future? Not eating rice and noodles forever?
3) I sincerely think you are not slimming down.
4) Cycle again? how much can 20 to 30 mins of cycling help?
5) i used to swim and lift weights, cycle and run. I know how exercising doesnt help in slimming. Besides, you are doing less than what i used to do in the past, how to slim down?
6) i dont know how long more are you gonna take to slim down.
7) and many more…
Frankly, i am very offended. Yes, i am sucha person, if you call me petty, i am fine too. I am like that and i do not wish to hide. Yes, i know alot of people tell me to just ignore people like that. But i cant help feeling terrible because i have never met someone so negative, insulting, discouraging, and ignorant at the same time.
I have repeated myself umpteen times of how i love to exercise and how i dont mind eating lesser rice (no human should eat large amount of carbo like rice and noodles anyway).
And i am doing all these now because i love to, i am willing to, NOT only because i am trying to shed fats.
Basically, i disagree with the saying Eat To Live. I do not think that one should only eat to live. There are so many varities of food in the world, there are so much good food and why should we just eat to live? That is a waste.
Food is not just fuel, it can be an indulgence and i feel we should indulge in good food, even fattening ones, but in moderate portions. Everything in life has to be moderate, too much of anything is not good.
Thus i do not think that eating clean should be a 24/7 routinebut it is a must. Likewise, fast food and food that is not so healthy should be consumed in moderate portions too. We shouldnt live to regret (of not eating nice food! )
She obviously doesnt get it. Or maybe she is just trying to be sarcastic as she lost 8kg due to TRA (a kind of fat burner, slimming programme by Nuskin).
I mentioned that i would try to take that TRA if i am damn rich as it costs 2k plus for 3months and thats the minimum fee to pay. It is effective and proven to be very good, it is not dangerous too. But i am not that rich.
Besides, i mentioned i love to do what i am doing now because Exercising boosts one’s confidence, and gives a kinda positive vibe to a person. Through exercising, i also learnt the logic of “Rome is not built in a day”. Everything has to happen slowly at its due time, depending on the effort you put in. Nothing comes easy. Seeing the muslces building on my arms, my triceps getting harder and more defined, i feel extremely proud of myself and i feel really good. ( i will take pictures the next time round to show, will also try to dig for ‘before’ pics and do a comparison).
To be honest, everyone knows and everyone says theories easily. I used to know the logic of “Rome isnt built in a day” but it is just saying. Not until i go through the various times of working out, then i realise that somethings cannot be rushed. I am experiencing the theory while others are just saying it using mouths. This logic applies very well in life, in alot of aspects. The confidence that exercise provides, makes me feel good about myself, makes me feel proud of the efforts i put in. The sweat, the tiny improvement of stamina and the tiny hardened muscles are all my achievements.
And no slimming programmes and pills can do that. I would love to lose more weight and shed more fats at the shortest time but i dont deny i love the feeling of working for what i want instead of short fixes. In chinese, we call it 苦尽甘来, working hard for something and reaping the rewards.
Well, i do not know how would i feel months later, it might be another short term interest of mine? Shrugs. But as long as i know, i am still yearning more of my cycling and swimming sessions. 😛
Actually, I didnt want to include this part as i really have no desire to talk about these people. But i couldnt help it, this crazy colleague was giving me 1 of those nonsense time again. I tried to ask God why am i in this place. Because my colleagues are really terrible people. They like to gossip and they like to judge, they like to insult and they like to hurt. Not only to me but towards each other, towards everybody.
Every single one of them, even the guys.
Women gossip and people think that is detestable? Try knowing gossipy men in my company, they gossip about my attendance (due to my constant absence recently due to my genuine sickness and my mum’s hospitalisation issue), they gossip about this and that, they gossip about how thing are not done on my side (i am not defending myself but they should question my Boss why things are not done – it is due to the lack of budget and i am not responsible for that)
I know i have done my work, in terms of Marketing wise, i have done my part and proposed all that i can. Marketing isnt some admin work, i need funds to do my work, i need supportive team members to execute my ideas, to help in the operation and execution. I have NONE and to make things worse, i have ignorant colleague correcting me when they themselves are making stupid judgement.
For eg. This colleague asked me to correct my spelling, he said: Val can u please check that typo?
I: what typo?
He: Staffs and not Staff, we have many staffs in the company.
I: there is no such word as staffs. It is like People, not “peopleS”
He gave a look and asked me in the most doubtful voice: Is it?
How rude is that right? I am ok if you are right and you correct me, but i am not ok when you yourself is wrong and you try to correct me. After i told you the truth, you disbelieve and shake your head STILL thinking that you are right.
I think i need Grace. Tons of them. 😦
Y are all my colleagues like that???
1 says that exercise is a waste of time, it is not good to do exercise, it doesnt help to slim down and etc (honestly i really roll my eyes at these)
The other actually suggest me to correct “MY TYPO”?
I have more to share but sharing about them just makes me unhappy.
I really wonder why God put me here. I am miserable everyday. If not for the money and the plan i have on hand at the moment….
Well, to make myself feel better, at least Mum is discharged and is at home now. I hope she recover soon.
I am tired and i am tired of typing already. I will update soon and hopefully i bring good news in my next post.
Some Camwhore moments…
My Sunday swim at gf’s and visiting aunt after that. Photobomb by irritating sis.
Ok i like this picture. Thank you. 🙂
Pardon the basins.
Til then` God Bless