Vdates June (1)

Hi`

I am back to blog about some updates.

Feeling very sleepy and lethargic now and i just wish to get this done and over with.

As usual, i know myself, if i drag this post any further, this post will never be up.

The past weeks were not very good for me, Mum was in the hospital and both Sis and i were so tired rushing  to hosp daily after work and we slept late everyday.

I think we still owe sleep debts and the weekends were really not enough.

Used to think that “having no time” is an excuse. Not till i finally realise that i literally have no time.

However, i managed to take some time off lunch to cycle in the gym, even if it is only 30 to 40 mins each time.

I used to hate exercising. SUPER HATE and MAJOR HATE. I know boys in the past who find Sporty girls hot and i was like “nah“. I know of sporty people in the past who never fails to try convincing me that exercising is good and Blah Blah Blah….

But i rejected and denied all Sports related topics.

However, thank God that due to my weight gain, i started to exercise.
Initially, it was really unbearable. It is like doing chores you hate, it is like super frustrating to me.

Before i start, i would like to say that i am not preaching about Health and Exercises because it can be rather boring, but i would like to share how i feel about Exercising . The views you are gona read will be coming from a person who has NEVER exercise since young (please do not include the Physical Education time in school), someone who really hated exercising.

Ok, at the beginning, i just want to shed some fats because i have gained weight though Chips and Chocs – nuff said (HAAA)
Comparing to the time i was really depressed while i was with my ex, i look alot more rounder than then. I was really sad and depressed back then and thus i look skinnier then.

Around a year ago.
Cant exactly find the pictures i took last time, this was during those times which i was not very happy (cant tell from the pic right?)
and i was kinda skinnier than now -_-
Pardon the damn wig.

.

.

Now!

 LOL the picture without mosiac is super MEH!
Thats my Aunt’s place btw, i went to visit her.

I started with running. It was not too bad because each time after running, i feel much better about myself.
Not that i would see immediate effects of slimming, but i feel better because i managed to do something i never thought i would, i managed to run 30mins each time even though i thought i would collapse at the 15th minute.

There is a sense of achievement and is really fulfilling.

I feel the immediate effect of being ‘lightened’ (of course, there will not be differences in the weight THAT FAST and thus it is not the weight i am talking about), i am talking about  the muscles and the ‘lightening’ feeling one has after exercising.
It is something like how you would feel after a massage.

That was in April and i was still eating normally, not exactly clean.

In May, i started doing more exercises and i managed to do some squats and stretching and  toning. Till date, i am still not very diligent in doing them, which i am guilty of.
However, i started going to the gym.

Almost everyone i know tell me the following points:

1) Exercise does not requires you to waste Money. Signing up with a Gym is waste of Money.

2) Going to Gym does not help you with slimming down.

3) It is a waste of time.

Well, i used to think that way too.

However, i really enjoy the facilities of the gym and i love using the machines. I know that the treadmill doesnt help in slimming but i am fine, i dont really like running on that, i rather run on my own if i wana run.
(i have stopped running for more than a mth thou, however i substitute running with other exercises, more on that later)

And the reason why i decide to sign a package with the gym is because….

1) I do agree that exercising does not requires one to spend $. But i am a noob in sports, i do not know what kind of exercises to do on my own, i do not know where to start without the help of machines and PT (personal trainers).
Yes, i can watch Youtube and learn but honestly, that is a chore to me.

I am not saying that i am rich, i do not know the definition of ‘rich’ as it varies but i am def not in the ‘rich’ category. However, i  guess i can still afford that $100+/ mth at the moment.
I want to enjoy my exercise regime and searching for ways on Youtube  is definitely not enjoyable for me.
I want proper guidance and someone whom i can ask.
I want a place which i can go to, to do my workout. Thus i decided to spend this amount of money.
It is approximately $150 a month for my package. Which also means  that it costs me around $15 per visit IF i visit the gym 10 times a month.

It has been less than a month since i am with the gym, and i think i lost count in the number of times i go. Prolly more than 10? I honestly cant remember. But at $15/ per visit, it is really worth it. (that is if i visit 10 times a month, if i visit more times a month, for eg. 15, it basically means i pay only $10 per visit)

There are also free lessons, which might cost a bomb if you sign up outside (i used to sign up lessons with the Community Centers and yeah, they arent exactly cheap)

2) I was saying how much i hated exercising right? To me, it was never easy to exercise because i was never a sporty person. I was lazy and i still am lazy to a certain extent. Exercising is not exactly enjoyable because i hated to sweat, i hated how i look during exercising (super unglam), i hated the out of breathe feeling.
I did not exactly excel in school for exercising and i used to think i am just not cut out for exercising.

However, during this period of time which i attempted to exercise, i find that i have fallen in love with working out.
It is a very refreshing feeling each time. On days which i am very tired and sleepy, i will usually rest but sometimes i push myself to cycle for at least 30mins and i usually feel super refreshed aft that.
I am not sure why but it is supposed to be good that one feels refreshed after exercising than feeling sick and tired after working out.

I do not know when exactly did i fall in love with exercising but i know i did. On days which i did not workout, i will feel guilty and i will yearn for another session of work out.
Is like…not seeing your bf/gf and you yearn to see them and feel them (and i am talking about the bf/gf that you really love and not the ones you are sick of, haha) Sorry but that is like the nearest description.

Thus i really do not mind if i slim down or not. Of course, it is a bonus to slim down, i would Love to slim down after exercising so much. But if i dont, i will not feel so shortchanged because exercising is like love to me now, i do not lose out either way because i am doing something i love and this thing that i love does not harm my body like “smoking” (i used to love smoking). Instead, i stay healthier because of exercising.

It is a win win situation.

Oh, and yah, i kinda replaced Running with Swimming and Cycling. I cant really swim well but i can swim, i cant cycle (ride a bicycle) but i cycle on the machines in the gym.
I enjoy doing these  than running and thus i have not been running.

Honestly, if you ask me, i rather do the workouts i enjoy doing than forcing myself doing something i dread.
Is not  that i hate running, but i really love swimming and cycling more.
And for more intensive cardio workouts, i use the step up machines.
I believe that one will continue the workout regime and not quit halfway only if it is enjoyable.

3) as i mentioned, it is a win win situation thus it is not a waste of time. Maybe it is the age. But i really regret taking care of my body only now because no $ can buy health. Even though i am not sick and all now, but it is good to take care of our bodies earlier as prevention is better than cure.

As alot of you already knew, i have a very irritating colleague who diss me daily because i exercise. She would say the following:

1) Gym and trainning with a PT is a waste of $. My friend did that for 3 mths and he did not slim down at all.

2) You are eating clean everyday but you are still not seeing results, so what are you planning to do in the future? Not eating rice and noodles forever?

3) I sincerely think you are not slimming down.

4) Cycle again? how much can 20 to 30 mins of cycling help?

5) i used to swim and lift weights, cycle and run. I know how exercising doesnt help in slimming. Besides, you are doing less than what i used to do in the past, how to slim down?

6) i dont know how long more are you gonna take to slim down.

7) and many more…

Frankly, i am very offended. Yes, i am sucha person, if you call me petty, i am fine too. I am like that and i do not wish to hide. Yes, i know alot of people tell me to just ignore people like that. But i cant help feeling terrible because i have never met someone so negative, insulting, discouraging, and ignorant at the same time.

I have repeated myself umpteen times of how i love to exercise and how  i dont mind eating lesser rice (no human should eat large amount of carbo like rice and noodles anyway).
And i am doing all these now because i love to, i am willing to, NOT only because i am trying to shed fats.

Greenssss

Basically, i disagree with the saying Eat To Live. I do not think that one should only eat to live. There are so many varities of food in the world, there are so much good food and why should we just eat to live? That is a waste.
Food is not just fuel, it can be an indulgence and i feel we should indulge in good food, even fattening ones, but in moderate portions. Everything in life has to be moderate, too much of anything is not good.

Thus i do not think that eating clean should be a 24/7 routinebut it is a must. Likewise, fast food and food that is not so healthy should be consumed in moderate portions too. We shouldnt live to regret (of not eating nice food! )

 Mac Cheese (carbo + cheese + meat!)

She obviously doesnt get it. Or maybe she is just trying to be sarcastic as she lost 8kg due to TRA (a kind of fat burner, slimming programme by Nuskin).

I mentioned that i would try to take that TRA if i am damn rich as it costs 2k plus for 3months and thats the minimum fee to pay. It is effective and proven to be very good, it is not dangerous too. But i am not that rich.

Besides, i mentioned i love to do what i am doing now because Exercising boosts one’s confidence, and gives a kinda positive vibe to a person. Through exercising, i also learnt the logic of “Rome is not built in a day”. Everything has to happen slowly at its due time, depending on the effort you put in. Nothing comes easy. Seeing the muslces building on my arms, my triceps getting harder and more defined, i feel extremely proud of myself and i feel really good. ( i will take pictures the next time round to show, will also try to dig for ‘before’ pics and do a comparison).

To be honest, everyone knows and everyone says theories easily. I used to know the logic of “Rome isnt built in a day” but it is just saying. Not until i go through the various times of working out, then i realise that somethings cannot be rushed. I am experiencing the theory while others are just saying it using mouths. This logic applies very well in life, in alot of aspects. The confidence that exercise provides, makes me feel good about myself, makes me feel proud of the efforts i put in. The sweat, the tiny improvement of stamina and the tiny hardened muscles are all my achievements.

And no slimming programmes and pills can do that. I would love to lose more weight and shed more fats at the shortest time but i dont deny i love the feeling of working for what i want instead of short fixes. In chinese, we call it 苦尽甘来, working hard for something and reaping the rewards.

Well, i do not know how would i feel months later, it might be another short term interest of mine? Shrugs. But as long as i know, i am still yearning more of my cycling and swimming sessions. 😛

Actually, I didnt want to include this part as i really have no desire to talk about these people. But i couldnt help it, this crazy colleague was giving me 1 of those nonsense time again. I tried to ask God why am i in this place. Because my colleagues are really terrible people. They like to gossip and they like to judge, they like to insult and they like to hurt. Not only to me but towards each other, towards everybody.
Every single one of them, even the guys.

Women gossip and people think  that is detestable? Try knowing gossipy men in my company, they gossip about my attendance (due to my constant absence recently due to my genuine sickness and my mum’s hospitalisation issue), they gossip about this and that, they gossip about how thing are not done on my side (i am not defending myself but they should question my Boss why things are not done – it is due to the lack of budget and i am not responsible for that)

I know i have done my work, in terms of Marketing wise, i have done my part and proposed all that i can. Marketing isnt some admin work, i need funds to do my work, i need supportive team members to execute my ideas, to help in the operation and execution.  I have NONE and to make things worse, i have ignorant colleague correcting me when they themselves are making stupid judgement.

For eg. This colleague asked me to correct my spelling, he said: Val can u please check that typo?

I: what typo?

He: Staffs and not Staff, we have many staffs in the company.

I: there is no such word as staffs. It is like People, not “peopleS”

He gave a look and asked me in the most doubtful voice: Is it?

I: yah.

He smirked.

How rude is that right? I am ok if you are right and you correct me, but i am not ok when you yourself is wrong and you try to correct me. After i told you the truth, you disbelieve and shake your head STILL thinking that you are right.

I understand this but i am really not very happy over his ignorant opinion.
Sorry but i dont think he deserves to be called a ‘sheep’ either.

I think i need Grace. Tons of them. 😦

Y are all my colleagues like that???

1 says that exercise is a waste of time, it is not good to do exercise, it doesnt help to slim down and etc (honestly i really roll my eyes at these)

The other actually suggest me to correct “MY TYPO”?

I have more to share but sharing about them just makes me unhappy.

I really wonder why God put me here. I am miserable everyday. If not for the money and the plan i have on hand at the moment….

Sigh.

Well, to make myself feel better, at least Mum is discharged and is at home now. I hope she recover soon.

I am tired and i am tired of typing already. I will update soon and hopefully i bring good news in my next post.

Some Camwhore moments…

My Sunday swim at gf’s and visiting aunt after that. Photobomb by irritating sis.

I love my triple eye lid because Leslie has it too! Same eye too! Left side. 😛
Just Random.

Ok i like this picture. Thank you. 🙂
Pardon the basins.

Til then` God Bless

Vdates – End of May (and full of rantings)

Hi and in a blink of eye, 2013 is half gone.

I really hated the fact how time flies without me realizing. During my youngER days, each day is a dread and i do not know how to get past those days.

When i was in Primary school, i hated school because i was a dork and i was being bullied regularly.
The 6 years were terrible and each day was a struggle to me.

When i was in Secondary school, i have to worry if my Discipline master will catch my tinted hair, my not very long school skirts and basically all the other disciplinary problems lah. Thus the years crawled slowly and i cant wait to get into the society and work. (totally regretted having that thinking)

During Poly and Private Schooling days, i cant remember what happened but it didnt seem fast either.

Then it was those few years of feeling lost, not knowing what work to do, what job to get, what to do with life before i turned abit more serious at around 25 yo.

Those days of being lost and ‘useless’ really passed by very very slowly.

Recently, i have more plannings, more commitments and goals, time seems to fly its way at the fastest speed and it is not enough even if i am given 48hrs a day.

Sorry for growing up at a slower pace and at a later age. I am not sure how mature are my readers,  i am not sure who are you guys.
But do you also feel the same as me? Do you also feel that being committed and responsible for more things in life seems to make your days so short?

I only get to feel this way now because i really have alot of worries and things on mind, i really do not know how i manage to get pass each day in the past.

Anyway, back to vdates, my past week was TERRIBLE and i thank God it is over.

I dont even feel like starting but i guess i will have to.

Had another huge fight with my Family and this time round, it is MY FAULT. My sis said something unpleasant abt a relative and instead of being patient with her, i flared up and started to bang on things (tables,chairs, doors). Unbelievably mean of me.
I remember being very patient initially but i was just too outta control that night and i said nasty things and ran out of the hse in a fit of anger.

She was at fault for giving names to a relative  and i m very glad she realised it already but i was worse because i swear and cursed and i screamed at my Mum and her. I said alot of nasty things and i poured all my bitterness out.

Sometimes, i wish my sis can do that, so that her bitterness towards me and Mum can be confronted and dealt with. But nope, she doesnt and in the end, i was the 1 who did that. Damn.

I thank God i have gf with me, when i said the most nasty words tt hurt my Mum, gf was there talking to her. I really thank God that Mum also builds up her Faith and tried praying during such times. In the past, she wud just blame God.

Now, she would tell me: do u think this is spiritual attack?

I was like WOW MUM!

Mum prepared this for my Lunch. Looks sickly but it taste very good – it is Chicken Breast.

Ok, i din intent to put all the blame on Satan that idiot, i have my part to play for giving in to temptation (of anger) but i thank God for His faithfulness. He reconciled us back together and this time round, it is quicker than usual.

I apologized to Mum and poor Mum has to suffer all my nonsense and talk nicely to me. I really love her alot, and i really am willing to do anything for her. She really show me what is selfless love. How can anyone love me so much besides Jesus?

I did not imagine i would apologize to my sister but i eventually did.

Honestly, as much as i hate to admit, i am a rather prideful person. I have no issues of admitting wrong and saying thanks – but thats only to people i am not very familiar with. To closer friends and family members, i tend to have that nasty pride problem that hold me back from saying Thanks and Sorry. I do not know why but i am THANKFUL that i am learning how to get that pride issue aside.

From this incident, something in me vindicated me badly. Something, a voice (if you wana call it a voice) in me KEEPS telling me i am wrong.
I have no choice but to approach my sis and apologize to her.
She surprised me though, she did not say much this time except for admitting her own mistakes  (no defensive statements from her).

I then realized that actually Pride is like a heavy weight, it is extremely hard to handle as it stretches your muscles while holding them. But they are not that hard to let go, and once you let go, your muscles feel relaxed.

As of 3pm today, sis and i were chatting away like kids:

[2:51:54 PM] Valencia Lesley: hi MT
[2:51:56 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u

[2:52:16 PM] MT Cheng: …

[2:52:23 PM] Valencia Lesley: y?

[2:52:30 PM] MT Cheng: lol

[2:52:30 PM] Valencia Lesley: i tink despite u being a XXXX sometimes
[2:52:31 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u
[2:52:37 PM] Valencia Lesley: since young i bully u

[2:52:39 PM] MT Cheng: f off HAHA

[2:52:42 PM] Valencia Lesley: wen i teach u maths
[2:52:45 PM] Valencia Lesley: i not patient with u
[2:52:49 PM] Valencia Lesley: 1+1 = 2

[2:52:52 PM] MT Cheng: despite being XXXX. wth

[2:52:53 PM] Valencia Lesley: bt u were SO STUPID
[2:52:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: u say 3

[2:52:57 PM] MT Cheng: aiya still say

[2:53:00 PM] Valencia Lesley: then i ask again

[2:53:01 PM] MT Cheng: my maths not good.

[2:53:01 PM] Valencia Lesley: u say 4
[2:53:04 PM] Valencia Lesley: then u say 6

[2:53:09 PM] MT Cheng: SINCE WHEN I SAY that? HAHA

[2:53:09 PM] Valencia Lesley: i was lik WTF is wrong w u!??!
[2:53:12 PM] Valencia Lesley: 1+1 = 2 la?!??!?!
[2:53:18 PM] Valencia Lesley: wher the 4 6 3 come frm?
[2:53:33 PM] Valencia Lesley: HAHAAH bt i m ashamed tt i m so impatient with a small kid lik u
[2:53:35 PM] Valencia Lesley: so i am sorry
[2:53:36 PM] Valencia Lesley: i love u
[2:53:43 PM] Valencia Lesley: n u said tt
[2:53:50 PM] Valencia Lesley: bc i rem clearly i scolded u say u stupid
[2:53:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: althou really abit stupid
[2:54:02 PM] Valencia Lesley: bt u were jus a kid
[2:54:03 PM] Valencia Lesley: i m sorry
[2:54:13 PM] Valencia Lesley: n i noe u are capable of bigger things
[2:54:19 PM] Valencia Lesley: so u r nt stupid ok

[2:57:31 PM] MT Cheng: haiz.
[2:57:39 PM] MT Cheng: i know im born smart

[2:57:44 PM] Valencia Lesley: … not really.

[2:57:46 PM] MT Cheng: but my talents are hidden
[2:57:48 PM] MT Cheng: HAHHA
[2:57:48 PM] MT Cheng: u guys didnt know

[2:57:52 PM] Valencia Lesley: lol!

[2:57:54 PM] MT Cheng: till now

[2:57:54 PM] Valencia Lesley: omg.

[2:57:55 PM] MT Cheng: well

[2:57:55 PM] Valencia Lesley: hahahhahah

[2:57:57 PM] MT Cheng: not so late

[2:57:57 PM] Valencia Lesley: WADEVER

[2:57:58 PM] MT Cheng: LOL!

[2:58:02 PM] Valencia Lesley: i m gona post this
[2:58:04 PM] Valencia Lesley: shit u

[2:58:06 PM] MT Cheng: WTF

[2:58:10 PM] Valencia Lesley: 😉

[2:58:11 PM] MT Cheng: HAHA
[2:58:15 PM] MT Cheng: blackmail
[2:58:19 PM] MT Cheng: can sue u for that
[2:58:19 PM] MT Cheng: haha

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHA

I was very happy and i am still happy. We are now planning for our first Family trip for Mummy’s Birthie! 😀

I will most prolly be away for Aug for Mum’s birthie and the Project i have with gf. I pray for Open doors of Opportunities from God and i see how He guide me step by step, small steps and big steps. I believe He has a plan for me (and gf) so i believe we will do well. Praise the Lord!

Went to visit Gf at the MBS suite and she bought bubbles for me! So happy! 😀
Chris and her (and my Mum) say that i am like a kid.

Then, before  May ends, i had an argument with Seven. I really do not think it is right to say it here but i also do not know if it is my fault.
I asked a few people about it and besides acknowledging tt i have a screwed up temper issue, the real problem here is not only my temper issue but a friendship issue.

Something is very wrong with the friendship.
Sometimes i feel that i am not being treated fairly in this friendship as her priority is no longer the friendship or something pure and fair. Her priority now is Gary, her beau, who happens to be a good friend of both of us too.
Hate to say this, i am not envy of her because after seeing what she is going through in this r/s, i really thank God i am single.
Not saying that she is suffering or whatever, that is not up to me to judge, but i am saying i wouldnt want to be in her position.
Hate to say this, i am not jealous at all but i do feel that the Seven i respect is now another person whom i might feel very …hard to find words.
I just feel that she changed and i can only say i am silly to expect from a human.
As much as she is very spiritual, kind, helpful and please-fill-up-the-list-with-all-the-good-virtue-pointers, she is still a human after all.
Why am i expecting her to be the same rational friend that held neutral stands that i once had?

I do not know what to do with the argument that we had, we basically did not talk after tt.
Knowing her well, she is not the least bothered because friendship, r/s, kinship and wadever ships to her are just secondary.
She told me she wouldnt even cry if someone close pass away. What do you think?
I know she is a rational person and some call her cold hearted. But i just thought it is not a problem for her to get over.

I did not tink of apologizing because i am still rather disturbed with what had happened. If doing something for me in the not so legal way is not possible, then why get me involved with the policy in the first place? Because even if i do not trouble Gary to help out, the whole thing is still Not legal.
So whether you get Gary to help me or not, you are still involving me in a NOT legal thing what. Why do you have to portray how righteous Gary is then? I mean, if he and you are so righteous, then why are you all doing the same not very legal thing for others?
I am not very sure about how insurance policies work thus you cant expect me to know everything. Is like, do you need to use  the word “Fraud” on me, hello?

Ok thats so much i am revealing, i am not gona get anyone into trouble by saying more, if you are smart, you would have guessed it.

As for me, i understand that when one apologize, it doesnt always mean that one is wrong, it is sometime for the r/s.
But for this case, i really do not know what to do, apologize for my attitude perhaps? But not for her selfish thoughts for Gary before me. I understand he is her beau but i feel crappy inside me.

Would also like to say this, yes i admit i kinda expect everyone to behave like me and i am really trying my best to change this very BAD habit of mine. Of course, i cant expect everyone to be fair and not 重色轻友 (the 4 chinese characters means one that cares more for his or her beau so much to the extent of neglecting friends)

I have my moments of being sucha bad person before too. I was busy being depressed with my last Ex, and i neglected Regine (which also made her very bitter towards me even after so long. She recently confessed that to me. Yes, how nice to have family arguments, frenship problems all tog right?)

But honestly Regine, i hope you see this and think about it, i have helped you many times before which i hate to claim credits for those times, you helped me multiple times before too. But you do realize that you ‘abandoned‘  me for some guys before too right? You do realize that as much as Adrian was a real jerk, i was blind that time and i wanted to marry him and thus i was depressed like mad when he abused  me and betrayed me during that time right? Y did you hate me so much for that 1 year of me abandoning you? I basically abandoned myself back then, dont you realize? SIGH.

I cant expect everyone to be as ‘tough’ & ‘cool’ as me, but u know how i cringe whenever Seven does the doll voice to coax Gary each time we are out. I mean, ok fine…couples like to do these lovey dovey things but i am not invisible, if you want to do all these, perhaps i shouldnt join the outing…right? It is really awkward for me.

I am a terrible person lah. I can only get along with certain people because these people accept me and i can accept them fully with no frustrations.
Terrible right?

I wouldnt be like others bc i wouldnt find excuses to defend myself saying i am cool because i am who i am. I am indeed terrible, that i admit.
I know i have been told that the real problem is me because i cant get along with people.
I agree, sadly.

I am trying to accept people and i am learning but i am still not able to do it. I think i need time and His Grace.

While typing this, my colleague who lost 7kg from the Nuskin TRA programme, came and remarked on my diet sarcastically AGAIN.

She lost alot of weight and it is obvious, from 75, 76kg to 68kg now? Well i do not know if she lies about her weight but from her shape, i can tell she lost weight. Good for her but she has been pushing me to buy that TRA thing for the longest time even after i told her i have commitment issues as i am with the Gym now and i am saving up for stuffs.

I would love to try TRA, why not right? I wana slim down too. I gained like 10 kg in a year of stuffing everything into my mouth last year.
But i would love to know i work for what i want, i cant deny i have fallen in love with exercising – Cycling, Swimming, Stretching and etc.
She pities me CONSTANTLY and say i am very 可怜 (pitiful), but i do not feel i am suffering.
She dissed my exercise regime, i was like…wads wrong with exercising???? Yes i would try TRA if i can afford to (it is $2k over for 3mths)
BUT i would still exercise EVEN if i am doing through that TRA crap.
I thought i made myself very clear already.
She dissed my healthy fruits and salad diet because she can eat fried chicken chops and other fried food because she has that TRA thing.
But why cant i eat healthy instead? Besides slimming down, i would like to be healthy too what?!
All those pills and supplements makes one slim down in a rapid rate, if i say i do not want that, i am lying.
But i also treasure my workout times, i love to work out and tone my muscles, i love to eat healthy now.

Nothing wrong right?

Used to think tt 15mins on the cycling machine is crazy but i did 45mins ytd.

I honestly dont really care what you will say or dissed abt cycling because i have alot of people telling to me that it doesnt wrk if you wana slim down and etc
No doubt, i hope it works but if it doesnt, i will still love cycling. Just because you do not have the heart to cycle or cant put your lazy bum on that machine, just because you cant put in effort to exercise and you dissed me of the exercises i do… thats very mean.
Dont be surprise because there are alot of people like that around. They love to bring others down because they cant do it. They are hoping you are as lazy as them.

Dearie Mummy prepared apples for me for lunch. 3 small apples! Yummy.

 

So you see, here i am complaining about another person. Terrible right?

I know I know and I know. I know i should learn to accept people and see their Good besides their Flaws. Because i wouldnt want others to see my flaws only.

Just this Morning, i bumped into Alex – my churchmate and his wife. I said hi and smiled, the wife looked away as usual whereas he greeted me happily and asked me how am i.
You see, Alex is a wonderful man, he is humble and helpful to everyone. I wouldnt say the same of his Wife because she is from HK and many told me she has a different culture background. (LAME EXCUSE FOR HER RUDENESS I KNOW, i rolled my eyes when the people told me that too)

Basically, She chooses her friends carefully. (even her husband says that)
I do not know if it is a bad thing because frankly, you cant blame her as you see, i choose friends too. (read above and you know what are the people i really wouldnt like to be friends with)

But i do think that as much as you choose friends, you have to have Manners lah. People say hi to you, smile at you, but you glared and look away?

I might not be AS RICH as those that you see in church (whom you have to suck up to), i might not be as pretty as your expectation, i might not be wearing Pradas and LV, I might not be the most spiritual gal in the church.

BUT I HAVE NEVER OFFENDED YOU IN ANYWAY!? I EVEN OFFERED YOU DRINKS, I TRIED TO GET FOOD FOR YOU WHEN WE WERE DINNING TOGETHER, I TRIED TO BE NICE.

I am not what you expect me to be and you can Don’t Friend Me , but you have NO MANNERS.

Hongkong teach you to be like that meh? Or Jesus taught you that? (ok Jesus will never teach her that i am sure)

So my main point here is, i wana whine about people who irritated me for the past week. Nothing preachy. Just pure rantings.

Anyway, back to what i was saying, i was a terrrible person because my attitude to people depends on theirs to me. This is not totally wrong but it kinda reflects my low EQ. I cant help it. I am trying hard to change.  I have no excuses for myself but i can tell you…it is NOT EASY.

God have Mercy on me.

It is Fri tomorrow and a new Month is coming. The upcoming months will be very challenging and i am glad i have my God, my family and gf with me. A BIG THANKS to gf for realizing my dream a bit faster for me, and she has been very supportive too. Love her.
I also wana thank Chris for ‘lending’ gf to me for this tough period. 🙂

I love Mummy and my Sis, i really pray that they can be healthy and safe 24/7. (Random but mean it)

Ok Anyway, the coming weeks i will be really busy so i thought i better blog today before i go MIA for sometime.

Someone asked if i will still be blogging more, i dont know man.It depends.If i am free and i feel like it, why not?

If i am lazy and all (hope you know that blogging is rather tedious. thank God i am just a normal blogger that blogs for i duno who.
Imagine the stress of the ‘famous bloggers’ of having to commit?? Meh)

Ok, i gtg. Good weekend everyone~ Till next post and God bless.

p/s: i hope you are not surprise by the exceptional huge amount of rantings in this post. I really feel i have to let out the steam. I really am trying my best to be good but i really do not know where else can i vent out. I am human but that is not an excuse for my errors i know. Pray for me?

🙂