500 days of New Life

500 Days.

& lesser.

 approx 500 days for me to be completely bleached. 

a complete cleansed heart.

no memories at all

only realise it till i see it

i am very relieved and very very thankful 

extremely happy for myself

🙂

From e bottom of my heart, Thank you God. Jesus. CHC. Pastor Kong, Sun Ho, Eng Han & Janet, Mum & Sis, BBG211, Seven, Mel, Gary.

Thank you, Valencia.

Thats right, i thank you for being so strong despite the really bad shits you went through and standing stronger than ever.

I love you.

The old school Music and my Prayer for today

Today i am gona go into Mandarin Pop. Sorry, not the latest one. It might be the age, i dont know.

*Ok, before that, i would wana apologise for my last post, i guess i was pretty upset ytd. Lets move on from there 🙂

Anws, m not so keen in the Mandarin pop nwadays. I do know who are the usual entertainers, but just not interested and i have lost clue on all the new songs and etc.

So, i am gona be so old school and post some of the songs from 90s by Daniel Chan. LOL, i remember he was the only 1 that made me broke my own principle of not buying albums. I bought the one and only CD and it was Daniel Chan’s.

He looked like a prince. I mean, he still looks ok now. Here are some of my fav….

夜了为什么还不想睡
除了你 我还在思念谁
我并不是害怕黑 寂寞
却喜欢把整个我包围
好想再重新和你爱一回
让伤心的回忆通通都给化成灰
曾对你说没爱无所谓
其实自己脆弱不知道应怎么面对
故意在街上给冷风吹
故意在街上给冷风吹
等著你来温暖我心扉
终于也是掉下眼泪 爱情
不知不觉的不翼而飞
请你永远都把我骂好罪
那不用心痛日日夜夜为你心碎
你的爱曾经是绝对
我一辈子都会为我的愚昧而后悔Oh….
夜了为什么还不想睡
除了你 我还在思念谁
我并不是害怕黑 寂寞
却喜欢把整个我包围
好想再重新和你爱一回
让伤心的回忆通通都给化成灰
曾对你说没爱无所谓
其实自己脆弱不知道应怎么面对Oh…

Same clip lah, but in Chinese, not Cantonese. haha.

好想看看你　所以捨不得離去
等一個世紀都願意
你是否相信
只要給我一點點好運
真愛就會降臨

讓我猜猜猜　你會來來來
我的愛愛愛　不分是非黑白
我盼盼盼　我在想想想
心好痛～ 好亂

OH～ 真的好愛你
怎麼才能夠說服你
不能想你　就像不能呼吸

OH～ 真的好愛你
至少上天明白我的苦心
知道我付出一切　深愛你

好想陪著你　就算不多說一句
也能夠感應你的心

OH～ 你是否願意
只要輕輕靠在我懷裡
聆聽我的叮嚀

Very handsome right? My childhood favourite. Actually, not exactly favourite lah, i dont really have idols. I just listen to whatever thats nice.
I remember how i dislike BSB while e rest of my female classmates go crazy over them, oh, and the Moffats (where are they now ar?)

Just in case you do not know who the Moffatts are (they are a group of Canadian boys), they died down quite soon after that 1 hit Wonder – Miss you like crazy.
Quite radio friendly lah that song.

HAHA! Old School or not?

Ok, i know, my age is revealed. I know.
Is ok.
I feel people my era really look better anyway, LOL.

.

.

Of course, ntg beats my dearest.

.

.

Today, my mood is ok ok, is just the beginning of the day, so i cant really tell. But, by Faith, i am declaring that today is my best day as yet.

I have a wish today and my prayer for today, it is with my CG leader Eng Han. He is a man of Faith, of integrity.

I do not want to start all over again on the Church issue, but if you see me now and then (then as in i duno, 1 yr ago, 10 yrs ago), you should know how much the Church has helped me.  I might not be the most spiritual or well behaved person/Christian but you cant deny i have improved as a person and in life.

I thank my Church, my CG mates, my Pastor, my leader. Of  cos, my family as well. Just  that, i owe alot to Eng Han, he has never stop caring for me.

Whenever i need help, i just hafta make a phonecall, and he & his wife will try their best to attend to me.

Today, is a day i never expect to have, i have never imagine them, as high flyers themselves, will need help from us and al the help they nd from us is just prayers.

I remember saying this 1 yr ago “aiya, i am so paisey to ask them for help everytime.” (Paisey-embarrassed) 
Someone replied “u will never know when they need your help”
I was like “Oh please. how is that possible? they are successful, kind and rich”

But i guess the Greater man that do greater things has his trials to face.

I remember a year ago, i was a wreck. Eng Han and his wife, never hesitate to take time off their busy schedule to visit me and do deliverance on me.
After that very day, Eng Han gave me this verse which i remember till today and probably forever – Deuteronomy 28:8

I was a new person ever since. Call it psychology effects, but to me, i know God use him well. I feel God, i know God more.

And lastly, despite my small giving(comparing to some) or (in the past-no giving ($), he has never treated me unfairly. He treats me with care like hw he treated other business men and reputable people with status.
He is that ever humble leader, that always wana find out more about my life. Although sometimes, he does forget what i told him, i mean, if i have a group of 100 over people, i might not remember everyone’s life so thoroughly too.

But i am thankful, he still remember pieces of my life and will recall about the stuffs i said. I was extremely honoured to be with him during this trial, to pray for him and to be named as “a fruit” of CHC.

I pray for all to be well today, and for God to be the JUST here, and may Lord bless his family and himself with peace and strength, may Lord open the eyes of the people and the law, for Law was 1st made by God. May the QC appeal be approved for this wonderful man.

Thanks for reading (and listening)!

i will be back for mre updates yea!

Deuteronomy 28:8
The LORD will send a blessing on your barns and on everything you put your hand to. The LORD your God will bless you in the land he is giving you.

*Eng Han,  u gave me this wonderful verse before and i now want to give this verse to you too.
I know you will be blessed, despite the allegations, those that knew you b4 the incident, those that know you during the incident, are all with you through the incident.
We are in this together.

I hope to encourage anyone reading this, this verse is for you too. Dont fear.

.

Your setback is a setup from Above

I have been thanking God how HE took away worthless habits and people from me. I think it has been a year plus and time really flies.
I came a long way and looking back, i am relieved i went through and walked past all those rocky paths.
Ready for new ‘set ups’ and is embracing every moment. Challenges, Blessings, bring it on~

Friends, today i realised something. I think i havent been a risk taker for very long. There is an aspect in my life which i do not dare to risk Anymore.
I guess i will find  that courage when i need to.

Before that, i have been discouraging people, not that i want them to be as timid like me, but i care for these people and i do not want to hear another sad story because it is not worth the risk- so i thought.

But now, i see them happy after taking up the challenge and it seems like the challenge was totally worth taking up.
I do not have that courage yet, perhaps when i do, i will let you know.

As for you, i urge you to take up  that challenge you are facing, and take the risk. If you fail, look above. Above the sky and think of the Creator, not my blogpost. HAHA.
Nah, look above these words too, you will know why your setback is not that bad afterall.

Without risking, and being contented and giving in to anything but your own wishes and wants, is just plain stupid-at least to me.
You own your life Although your parents gave it to you. But, it is given to you, isnt it? So it is yours already.

God gave your life and through your parents, you are here. Agree? No? Then dont read on anymore. Ha.

So, take charge of your life and love your parents, family and frens, take their advices and MAKE YOUR OWN DECISION.
Nobody should make any decision for yourself.

Reason why i include this part is because, i know people who make their decision because of others (i was like that in the past and sometimes i commit that mistake now)
Whether the ‘others’ here means friends, gf/bf or parents, it doesnt matter.
It is the same – not logical and totally wasteful. There is only 1 thing in the end- live to regret.

So, anyway, just to be an encouragement to readers today as i was kinda told to be, cherish what you have now, your pretty hair, goodlooks, good body, health, wealth, friendships, family, career ETC. For what you do not have, dont worry, all you have to do is to work on it. Fail to? Dont give up, and that setback will be a setup for you.

If my setback is so Shitty and i am seeing how it is a setup for me now, why not you?
I aint any more special than you.
We are on the same boat – Life

Give Thanks to …

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow is D-day.

My brand new day.

I pray and pray i will be safe truout, before and after.

I pray that it will be obvious and visible.

🙂

I CANT BELIEVE IT. IT IS SO NEAR?!?!?! I MUST HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR VERY VERY LONG.

During  those mths and mths of  tiny tinges of sadness and impatience…the day is finally here.

By the way, i was very honoured. My wedding workshop event was a blast and everyone enjoyed it (well, couples who came to me and feedback all the positive stuff, saying you enjoy the workshop, you love tis n you love that…i can feel your love for me. haha. but if you were lying, i wudnt know right, so i assume you did not lie. hahaha)

Maybe, just maybe..being a Marketing person, we tend to be forgotten by the bosses, afterall, it is sales that matters right?
So what if you create or have created major super good event, at the end of the day, it is the sales that counts.
Thus, the credit usually goes to the other side and i am not surprised.
I am just surprised how quickly i MIGHT BE forgotten. Like, how i search for the right people to work with, from scratch, from meetings and meetings, from price negotiations, from tis to tt.
How my colleagues were so against having this event, saying that my event suck and all..how hard i fight for this event to happen…

Imagine this. u and another lead actor were nominated for the Best Actor award for the same mega film.
It is obvious that you ought to win the title but somehow, the other one won it.

I am not saying that others deserve no credit, i applaud the ability in that area because i obviously hate it but enjoy doing the shit job behind the scene n create an avenue for sales but mostly on awareness building.

But….i just do not enjoy being unappreciated i guess. Oh, colleagues that are reading (if you are), i honestly have ntg much to talk to you guys anymore. I mean, since it is clear what you want or do not want from me, all the nasty words you gave me during work.
But do you remember how you despise me when i wanted to do this event?

Anyway, it is who i know and not what i know that make this event a success and i am SO GRATEFUL to the people below. Honestly, the credit belong to them!!

1) Steve Thio – the Chief Editor of Female Brides
He has to be  the most wonderful person in the media industry i met. Superb attitude, helpful and i dont know what to say. honestly, he is really a very STEADY person. I know i know, i might chew off more than i can bite, off him…so i am so apologetic too! But Thank you Steve. Love u so much!

2) Veronica – salesperson of Female Brides
Always patient towards my ridiculous requests, despite being preggy. You now hw preggy woman can feel sometimes, but i feel i am the preggy one when i work with her. Goodness. She has no temper! Very sweet lady.

3) Acoustic Tavern
They have to be the most dedicated musicians ever. Always working hard to improve in terms of performance. Meet my needs as a partner and very very hardworking. I love them so much. If you ever need wedding or performing bands, please please search them on FB – Acoustic Tavern.
Many of my guests enjoyed their singing and i am sure you would too!

4) LaiChan
Needless to say, he is branded. His Cheongsam designs are more than just gorgeous. Remember Wong Kar Wai’s ‘In the mood for love’? If you feel like swaying in a tight body hugging sexy cheongsam like Maggie Cheung, please please, you gotta look for LaiChan.
I have never seen a more humble, sincere and nice TOP designer. He is just so nice! Dont be intimidated by his big name though, he is really VERY nice. Soft spoken and warm, i am so blessed to know great peeps like him.

5) The Prelude Bridal
Tann Ling, the owner of The Prelude is a stunning lady. Soft spoken (i dont know why all these designers/owners all very soft spoken n super humble 1, i am really blessed) and very gentle. Talented woman and she is someone you would want to talk to, with regards to your wedding gown requests.

6) Flavour Favour & Thinkads
Faye from FF and Sam from Thinkads. They are around my age, and naturally we talk and bitch while we work. Super nice ladies and VERY CREATIVE. Please look for them if you have any ideas for your wedding cards, ang pows, Guo-Da-Li stuffs. They will def make your ideas into 2382-389-032 ideas. Yes! they are that creative!

7) UOB Merchant side
thanks Joanne, you are the nicest and non-bitchy partner i ever have, especially when i am so full of requests! Thanks for being patient!

Ok, i hope i didnt miss anyone here. I doubt any of them gets to read this, BUT if , just if, if any of them reads this, i hope it warms their hearts!

Opps, i forgot to thank my lovely Boss, though she is sometimes anal about stuffs but ok la,  thank you for the chance.

And And And! The Guests, you guys are damn awesome la, so supportive, lucky me. If not i would tremble on stage with my nervous breakdown on stage la.

Ohohoh! The make up artist- Grego. Thank you my dear. I love you, you are just so ridiculously nice, i cant thank you more!

So happy that i have made very good friends along the way. 🙂

Ok, 1 big big stone off my chest now. 1 mission completed, i am so gona complete mission by mission before… haha.

Alrighty, a personal big mission for me tomorrow. If you love me, please pray for me, for my safety, for my success (you dont need to know what success la, just wish me well? ahha. i love u!)

Thank you Mummy, this lady supports me very silently 1. i love her to bits.

Thanks Gary and 7. I know you guys rem my stuff, very touching.

haha. i machiam really nominated for best actor. But i just feel the need to thank la. You know, no human is obliged to treat you nice, so if there is/are, you should express and thank them! they deserve all attention and glory!

All in all, i would love to Thank God.

People always ask me why am i thanking God for my own hardwork.

Here is why.

Whenever i sit down to think of plans to do, i have ZERO idea in my head.

I pray to God and ask for wisdom.

The idea didnt come immediately but it eventually pop up in my head.

Then, i will set my foot to go forward and do the 1st step. In fact, i will go tru many steps. But each and everytime i feel a voice in me telling me “no dont use him, dont go that way, dont use that publication and etc”…i will feel alittle shocked and uneasy..

Then..thats when i ‘make a u-turn’ and choose the other way.
It always turn out to be a better way to go! Just like this time, i choose to work with Steve even before i met him…guess the spirit of discernment is strong in me, by God’s grace.

Many instances, i am not saying Jesus is a lamp genie but it is like..weird… i prayed for a certain figure and it get that figure??? OMG. haha.

Of cos, HE doesnt do magic all the time. When i started to doubt, i  can always hear this voice in me saying: I did not give you 100, i did not and will not give you the perfect score because dont you realise that you did not do a perfect job that worth a 100%? Didnt i send people to comment on your work, your design, your marketing skills? Listen to them and do better next time. I will not give you a 100%  this time because i want you to learn”

This is scary isnt it? I mean, i do not usually imagine this kinda conversations in me, i mean, REALLY I DONT.
I daydream yes, i daydream abt Leslie Cheung, i daydream abt nice dresses and i daydream abt nice and new hairstyles but not such conversations la!

So it isnt self imagination to me. ok la, haters gona hate, non believers gona judge, i am fine, so used to it infact. But i just have to get this off my chest because i really feel the 1 working for me…Jesus. Thank you Jesus. I really know it is you. Thank you for sending angels and opening doors, thank you for everything!

Alrighty i gtg. There is a lack in pictures in my blog nwadays and i am sorry. haha. I have not many images to upload but i will take more when i am back yea!?

Meanwhile, take care, God Bless!

p/s: to that atheist that wrote crap, please do not insult yourself by writing such thing. the bible is NOT bullshit. But i feel your blog is, because it is so rude to read about your insensitivity. If you have not experience God nor what was written, dont claim it as bullshit. You Just Havent Experience It. Yes, you were in church for vry long and you claim to be a Christian even. So what? Some people live all their life realising they havent been clear about what they have been living, they merely exist. Some people took a lifetime to figure out who they really love. So it doesnt matter how long you have been a Christian, if you havent have the chance to encounter God, prolly you are not very near to Him or whatever, then you havent encounter Him. It doesnt matter the length of you being a Christian. Calling the bible bullshit reflects badly on yourself and sorry but you sound like a bullshit yourself. Please show some respect.

Be with You

This is my song  for the night.  Very peaceful isnt it.

I was feeling rather low again, for these few weeks. I have been thinking what can i do to make myself feel happier because i hate being emo. I am already such a blessing, being blessed with a life, yet i still feel there is more to it. I feel i need more, more of what?

I have been wondering what is the ‘remedy’.

After times and again, i am even more sure, Him and doing work for Him.

I love you Jesus, i was so tired and lazy, lethargic and i cynical, i nearly want to give up on being a friend to someone who is lost, and lonely.

I thank you for allowing me to be your servant.

I thank you Jesus, for i cant feel any happier, than this. I always feel so so so much happier to talk about You than anything or anyone. It happened so naturally and i almost cant feel myself talking but it was You, it was Holy Spirit that lead You to my friend.

Lord, i pray to u to bless May, i pray that she will come to know you, i pray for peace for my friend D, i pray for Jesus to pour down your love, let me soaked in your presence.

Thank you for using me.

TGFE

It is finally Friday! Thank God for everyday and especially Friday!

Was taking a breather downstairs because it was too cold in my room. Witnessed a car accident. The loud bang was shocking.
Nobody is hurt, but the black car is totally crashed.

I feel uneasy. Anyone would be uneasy, but i feel even more uneasy because the car looks familiar.
Well, i glanced briefly at the driver and nope, i dont know the driver but my heart still skipped a beat though.

A sick feeling was in me, is like… what if the driver is some1 i know or i love? Moreover, the car seems like it is the same model of someone i know.

It dawn to me that accidents happen everyday, life is fragile, yes we know that but sometimes we need to be reminded of that.

People nowadays take everyday for granted, too easily.
Sometimes, is not until you witness such things, having the image right at your face, then you would realise that “Everyday is not Guaranteed, is not expected”

Everyday is actually a great blessing to every1. Some people fight for their life, their every breathe while some of us choose to live by everyday.

It is not easy to stay positive or happy during hard times, i can safely say that because i am a very negative person by default. Nobody would feel happy if they are facing financial difficulties, facing rejections from people, disappointments in life, fighting illness and etc.

But, sometimes, when we think that our problem is so huge, we forget that there are bigger problems that others r handling. Yes, other people might be able to handle bigger problems and you dont give  a damn because you just do not want problems in your own life. But, that is not possible as long as you are alive. Our problems may be big today, but there is nothing bigger than our God, the creator of all things. If you aint a believer, yet you are still blessed with a life, look, problems are dead, you are alive, problems cant be changed, but you can, change the way you react, think and strive on from there.

Frankly, i am trying very hard to be thankful everyday that i am alive. It is really not easy for me to live above emotions and problems too. But we really have to try if we really still want to be alive. Nothing is really ‘the end’ till the life is finished, thus, learning to be positive is essential, for every human kind.

At this time, i remember Pastor Phil (Advisory Pastor of CHC) saying this: during hard times, you need Faith when you need Faith.
Sounds deep, but actually, it makes total sense. When you need Faith at that very time, you need Faith to believe in what you need – Faith.

I sincerely pray today, for the safety of my love ones, and may Lord keep us steady and peaceful with Faith. Renew my Faith oh Lord!

 I suddenly want to post this old school Cantonese song by my favourite artiste. He is mesmerizing as an asian, singer, performer and actor. I love the meaning of the song, sometimes, i wonder if the song is written for human or God, it really make sense to confess such undying love and pursue for God. Whatever it is, it is really 1 of my fav songs. For those that do not understand Cantonese,  i hope you can read mandarin.

这一生也在进取 I am progressing in life
这分钟却挂念谁 But who am i missing at this moment?
我会说是唯独你不可失去 I would confess that it is you that i cannot lose
好风光似幻似虚 Those glamorous days seems lik illusions to me
谁明人生乐趣 Who really understand the joy of life?
我会说为情为爱仍然是对 I would say it is right to pursue Love
谁比你重要 Who can be more important than you
成功了败了也完全无重要 It doesnt matter if i win or lose
谁比你重要 Who can be more important than you?
狂风与暴雨都因你燃烧 Rain or shine, i burn for you
一追再追 I will pursue on
只想追赶生命里一分一秒 I want to pursue every second of my life
原来多么可笑 It is actually hilarious
你是真正目标 But you are the real goal
一追再追 I will pursue on
追踪一些生活最基本需要 Pursuing the basics of life
原来早不缺少 In reality, i do not lack

有了你即使平凡却最重要 Having you in my life, even being ordinary is meaningful
好光阴纵没太多 There aint much good times
一分钟那又如何 What is 1 more second of that
会与你共同渡过都不枉过 As long as i am with you, it is not wasted
疯恋多错误更多 Passionate and wrong r/s we had
如能从新做过 If i can start over again
我会说愿能为你提前做错 I would be more than happy to with you regardless

只得你会叫我彷佛人群里最重要 Only you will make me realise that you are the most important among all the people around me
有了你即使沉睡了 Having you with me, i would smile even while i sleep..
也在笑

As usual, i will do some simple translation in my own understanding for you guys. 🙂 Nice, i am. haha.

Have a Blessed Friday every1!

p/s cant wait to spend my Fri with mummy and sis again. Love them!